Free Time.

Documentation

2010-07-20T23:16:00.000-07:00

This month has been so good. It is both a shame and a joy that I am not capturing more of it in text. I go to bed feeling inspired and peaceful. I feel like I'm settling in here. I think having recovered from a six day cold gave me a new found energy that has lasted through now. And today I actually got to sleep in, which felt wonderful.

The schedule here has opened up a bit. There has been a bit more freedom, a tiny bit of down time and a chance to pursue pet projects. I also had a quality day off on Saturday that started my week off right.

On my day off I borrowed my director's car and took a friend to the Getty. The Getty, for those who don't know, is a huuuuge museum up on top of a mountain, overlooking LA. It's modern architecture in all its glory, the museum grounds were worth the visit alone. I luckily happened to be there while there is a fascinating photography exhibit all about documentation from 1900 to 1960. While it was difficult subject matter, it seemed rather relevent to the work I am doing here in Pacoima.

The exhibit got me talking about this role documentation is playing in my life right now. I've been thinking how separate it can make me feel, detached from the action at hand. It also has just the slightest edge of exploitation that I think is important to address, even if I don't know what to do about it. When we capture things on film or with text we are representing the thing, but what we leave out and how we present our images tells just as much about ourselves as the thing we are documenting. I am on a journey to discover how to get good at this somewhat un-natural process. Documenting is important, it is our history, what we leave behind for the future. It is a matter of knowing what and how to capture a moment. This will be an ongoing process.

Yesterday I got to deviate from my role as a documentarian to spend the entire day hanging lights in the garden. It was hard work and a wonderful break. I got to climb scaffolds and hang from my legs and carry crazy heavy pipes up rickety things. It felt so good to do something so physical. I got dirty and sweaty and I woke up with slightly aching limbs. There's a sense of accomplishment when I work with my hands that I just love. There's nothing like looking up at all the lights hung up three stories in the air and being able to say "This is what I did today."

Today I got a chance to dig back in to documentation mode. I posted a new video to the company website, I worked with my partner and our intern to create a new video, and I got to meet with the muralist, Jaime Martinez, to work on a sketch of the mural we will start painting tomorrow. Jaime works really hard nearly every day. He isn't getting paid to do this work. He signed on to do this mural because I asked him to, be cause he wanted to, because it was something I was so excited to learn and he wanted to share it with the community. He showed up after work and sat down and started drawing. It was such a joy to watch him working so hard while laughing his butt off listening to the rehearsal in the next room.

Tomorrow I get to lead a warm up with four of my fellow students, and then we get to dig in and discuss future projects. I am so excited to find out what people are planning, as well as get some professional feedback about the work I would like to do. This will be a good start to writing grant proposals when I get home. After that meeting I am off to the garden to spend three hours hanging more lights, and then to spend four hours learning how to paint the mural. How kick ass are my days right now?!

So in the spirit of getting up at 8am tomorrow, I will wind down and say goodnight. I go to bed happy and excited for a new day.

FOMO: Fear of missing out

2010-07-13T23:59:00.000-07:00

It's difficult to find time in the day to write about the this challenging and exciting and often times exhausting program. It is now midnight, and only now am I settling into my bed. Today my day began with breakfast, then a warm-up, a three hour class on community participation, lunch, video editing, dinner, sawing into bike helmets with a bread knife to make car hat things for the play, completing my first ever video editing project including audio, filming footage for an upcoming "question of the day" video blog, and end of day meeting. And now I'm half participating in a conversation with my roommates about everything from relationships to capitalism.

Tomorrow will be even longer. Complete with (hopefully) waking up at 7 to take a walk across Hanson Dam, two full classes, seeing a performance in north LA, and working on my second video project. You'd think I'd be passed out, even I think I should be passed out. But I'm not, I'm strangely wired. So I thought I'd take the opportunity to update for the first time in over a week.

This past week was terribly difficult for me. As if the Cornerstone institute isn't difficult enough, my body decided this would be a great opportunity to get crazy icky sick for a whole 6 days. I did my very best to participate in as much as possible, but by the weekend it became necessary to take anywhere from 3 to 7 hour naps. During this week I learned the true meaning of FOMO and the role it plays in my life.

The fear of missing out is a real and serious affliction. I didn't realize that I had it until it was given a name. There is so much going on here all the time, and with all the amazing people and fascinating conversations, it's difficult to let even one opportunity slide by. But here's the thing, the more I become concerned about missing out, the more I realize it's impossible to be fully present in any one discussion or activity with that fear creeping down my neck.

I realize too that documenting is one thing that I have some trouble committing to fully. It has a lot to do with it removing me, at least partially, from fully engaging in the experience of being here or anywhere. But I do recognize the value of documenting. I am quite thankful to have this archive of my experiences and look forward to updating as time goes on. Blog specifically can be so helpful for keeping in touch with loved ones when times are particularly busy and interesting. But I think up until now I would feel guilt for the lag between posts. I am beginning to understand that taking my time to appreciate the moment is a good thing.

Even now I know that this entry could continue on, and maybe should since it has been so long since my last one, but my body is telling me to sleep, and I know the smartest thing I can do is listen.

I am very proud that today I completed my first video editing project, and feel confident that my next try will teach me more still. It's an exciting thing to learn a concrete skill that I will be able to use again and again. If you are interested in seeing it, and learning more about this wonderful project, you can visit the It's All Bueno blog at www.itsallbueno.wordpress.com. That is a great place to check for updates, especially because they are likely to be more frequent than the ones I post here.

For now it is bedtime. My apologizes for typos or weird language. I have no energy to edit at this time.

History

2010-07-04T22:39:00.001-07:00

I have just completed day four of the institute and I could not be more thrilled with the program. Today we had off for Independence Day. I spent this free time by waking up at ten, having a leisurely breakfast, catching up with loved ones, helping to make lunch, having lunch, going to the swimming pool with some fellow classmates (that had a super great spiral water slide), then went to a BBQ and finally to the city fireworks. A quality day off all around.

Yesterday was a very full and exhausting day; it made my heart race for what's to come. I started my morning at 7:30 with yoga, followed by breakfast, my audition for the play, then preparation for community auditions, lunch, the auditions and neighborhood recruiting, followed by a discussion about the auditions and neighborhood recruiting, dinner, and finally a three hour workshop on the history of Cornerstone. Which I will share a bit about now.

Cornerstone was founded in 1986 by a couple of Harvard graduates out to prove their professor wrong. Their professor told them that theater was a dead art form, they couldn't disagree more. For the first five years of their company they organized three month stays in rural American towns to create adaptations of classics, based on the towns that they visited and the issues that were important to the community. The goal was always to leave something behind for the the people to build upon, often times it was seed money, or some other type of resources. The company eventually settled in Los Angeles, but that didn't stop them from working with companies all over the country.

So now we are in the city of Pacoima, in the northeast region of LA. There is a population of over 80,000 here, and the average household contains more than a family and a half. There is a history of gang violence, but there is also a remarkable number of non-profit organizations designed to lift the citizens up. It has been a pleasure and an honor to get to know this town and its people over the past few days, and I look very forward to continuing to dig deeper into this experience.

The play we are doing will be performed in the community garden. We will be able to seat 230 people each evening. I had the chance to visit the performance site yesterday while we were holding auditions. It was upon my arrival there that my heart really started to pound. One of the goals of Cornerstone is to help communities re-imagine the spaces they already have. In the case of Pacoima we will transform the garden into a performance space, and they are planning to create a stage that can be used by the town after we leave. The biggest excitement for me was discovering the long stretch of mural right where the audience seating will be. We just happened to be there while the muralist was there and he told us that he works with neighborhood kids to paint a new mural every week.

When I applied to get in to Cornerstone, I described a dream project of mine. I wanted to find a large stretch of wall to paint, and get performers and artist to create something of a constantly changing performance mural piece. I wanted to incorporate video and weblogging into the process as well. It looks like there might be a chance to make that dream, at least in some capacity, come true.

Tomorrow and Tuesday will be two more days of auditions and workshops. By Wednesday I should have a much better idea of what the rest of the month is going to look like. I could not have found a program more perfectly suited to my needs right now. I feel so blessed to be here with all these lovely and talented people. Learning more about the history of this company and the productions they have already done really brings the magnitude of what I am involved with into focus.

I have always followed my own path, I trust my instincts to get me where I'm going. It's the mentality that made me start the Bill of Rights project, what made me spend a year in Colombia, and what led me to Cornerstone's door. I have been writing my own history for a good many years now. And now I have this opportunity to become part of the rich and long history of this company.

I spent the evening with these new friends, eating amazing food and watching fireworks being set off all around me while surrounded by thousands of city residents. As I settle in for the evening I can't help but give thanks for this most special of Independence days.

Cornerstone

2010-07-02T22:57:00.000-07:00

So... I'm exhausted and ecstatic. Yesterday I arrived in Pacoima, California. After a two hour flight, a four hour layover, a four and a half hour flight and two shuttles, I finally made it to Discovery Charter Prep school, the home base for Cornerstone's summer theater institute. Since arriving I have meet over thirty like-minded artists, moved in with four lovely ladies, had an adventure figuring out our outdoor shower system, had many hours of discussion about our company's intentions for the next month, read through our play called It's All Bueno, went on a treasure hunt throughout the community, talked to strangers, had some fabulous meals, brainstormed with my peers on how to best engage the community in the month to come and all around enjoyed the company I am in. I forgot how much it is possible to fit in to a single day.

The best word I can use to sum up my experience so far is promise. This is the beginning of something big. Sitting in a circle and talking with others about this community and how we can serve it with our play has been so satisfying. I'm so impressed with everyone I have met. Before arriving, I was intimidated by how established so many of my classmates and teachers are. But being here, I realize that while my background is quite different, it is precisely why I fit into this group so well.

Tomorrow is audition day. The institute students have their's in the morning, and then we assist with the auditions for the community. Then more talking and eating, followed by a three hour class introducing us to the history of Cornerstone. We are scheduled from 9am to 10pm most days. This is a chance for me to really dig deep in to a new adventure with new people, working towards the worth while goal of bringing a community together through theater. The best part is I get to do all of this with this insanely talented and seasoned company in sunny California. And I get to take a 10 day road trip to San Fransisco and the Redwood forests to finish my stay here in the west.

My body thinks it's 2:30am. And I'm feeling far from articulate. I just wanted to put down some words to start. Everything is new, and the potential for learning is endless. Tomorrow I start my day with yoga at 7:45am. So it's time for sleep. But there is more to come. Much much more.

RENT

2010-05-06T12:29:00.000-07:00

Opening night tomorrow night. Pay what you can tonight. I can't believe the whole rehearsal process has happened since last I updated. Just goes to show how consuming it's been. Today we performed at ARTS OVATION, an awards ceremony for local community arts. I forget sometimes what a great community I come from, being part of RENT has given me new appreciation for my hometown.

When I set off for Colombia last January I was in search of my roots. It was a trip I will never forget, and it led me back here. Back home. Back to the first musical I ever fell head of heels in love with. I made a connection about a week ago that I can't believe I didn't realize sooner. On May 7th of last year I walked a labrynth in the desert of Villa De Leyva. There was a full moon, a fire going, drums beating, chanting, and lightening dancing over the mountain range. I was with a group of natives who I'd only met the day before. It was the most spiritual night of my whole life. I remember at the time of the walk all I could think about was the gratitude I felt pouring out of me, that I had a blessed life, and that while I had utterly no idea where I would be a year from then, I didn't need to be scared, because it would be wonderful. It just so happens that the opening night of RENT is tomorrow, May 7th.

I have a path, that much seems clear to me. But what makes it worth it is that so does everyone else. And where our paths cross is what makes life magical. I can't be more grateful to be part of this cast of 19 beautiful warm and talented artists, and a crazy awesome technical team to boot. The experience of coming together with these souls every night means the world to me. It has been a reminder of how much joy this place brings me. It has made me want to contribute even more. The word that comes to me now is connectivity.

I never did report that my final goal came true. I am proud to announce that I will be attending Cornerstone Theater Summer Institute in California. I even managed to get a scholarship. The institute runs from July 1st to August 1st, and then I plan on traveling for two weeks after that up the coast to San Fransisco and to the Red Wood Forests. This is as far into the future as I venture to plan. I am open to anything. Being part of RENT has made me think it might be nice to stay in the area a while. Especially if I am able to find a job worth being here for. New York will always be calling my name, but it is more important to find work I can commit my whole self to, where ever that may be. I look forward to the opportunities that lay ahead.

The beauty of RENT is that it celebrates life. It is about staying hopeful even in the darkest hours. It is about the connection between all of us and our ability to lift each other up. I have been very lucky in my endeavors, and I know it has everything to do with having such a supportive family and close friends. Being part of this production gives me a chance to give back in some small way to everyone I love. It is my chance to express my exceeding gratitude.

I am no closer to knowing my future than I was a year ago. But I was right, I don't need to be scared. Jonathan Larson's most iconic line is "No day but today." It rings true because life really is about being present, and about really embracing the opportunities presented to you. It is in my nature to keep an eye out for the future, but what this year has taught me is that I must live every minute with joy and intention, life will take care of the rest.

Still, my challenge is figuring out how to live life completely while still managing to document it in a way that will be helpful later. I hope my trip to California will have something to teach me about that. In the mean time, I have three straight weeks of RENT loving goodness to look forward to. Yay!!!!!

A Brand New Chapter

2010-03-23T10:47:00.000-07:00

I know I have not posted anything since my last days in Colombia, but the time has come. A lot has happened over the past few months, and there have been many times I thought about updating, but I was waiting for something, I just didn't know what. That something happened yesterday evening around 7pm.

Before I tell that story I first want to give you a brief update about the last 5 months. I returned to the US on October 14th, just 4 days before my 25th birthday. I rang it in by having a lovely and small dinner party with family and old school friends. I then went adventuring in New York before returning to the Lehigh Valley to find work. I ended up being very fortunate and found a job at the most adorable Irish Tearoom over on Main St. in Bethlehem. I worked there back when I was 18. I must tell you how crazy it feels to return to the same place knowing I am no longer the person I was then. The staff now is great, a small group of wonderful women who all get along and don't cause drama... hard to believe, but true.

I have spent the past months working in the tearoom (I also just started substitute teaching), spending time with the people I care about, and studying my face off. It's been a solid 8 years in the making, but I can finally see the light at the end of the under graduate tunnel. I'm currently taking 3 courses online: Short Stories, Communications and Diversity, and Immigration and Ethnic studies. In addition to that I am studying for an exam called "The American Dream" that is worth six credits. It's a lot of work, but it's got my brain ticking. I love what I'm learning, even when it's difficult. For my Immigration class I need to write a research paper, and I am taking the opportunity to document the Bill of Rights project and all that I have learned from it.

My time in Colombia was all about not having a plan, being open, and discovering myself anew. I also got to learn so much about my Colombian family, and even learn enough Spanish I was able to obtain 12 college credits upon my return home. It was an infinitely valuable time in my life that I will never forget. It gave me a chance to get a much better understanding of what is important to me, and the goals I would like to set for myself. By the time I returned to the states I set two very big and exciting goals, one that I have already managed to accomplish, and the other I am waiting to hear back about. I'll start with the one I'm waiting to hear about.

During my final months in Bogota I attended the Hemispheric Institute's Encuentro. I wrote a few blogs about it, and if you remember I mentioned a company called Cornerstone Theater. They specialize in community based theater, and have a month long summer institute in California. Ever since I took the workshop with them I have been longing to be part of that institute. It's been calling to me to way New York City did when I left school. I sent in the application on March 15th, it has made its way to the other side of the country and I should find out whether or not I got in by April 16th.

And now for the goal I accomplished. Before I returned home I found out that the very best theater in my hometown, Civic, who I had the pleasure of working with 10 years ago on the best show I've ever done (The Who's Tommy), is doing RENT in May. The second I found out my heart started pounding and knew I must be part of the cast. I can't tell you how much space this thought has taken up in my brain since as early as September. Well, the audition was on March 2nd. Over 50 beautiful and talented women were there. I managed to get called back, but then heard nothing for weeks. I assumed I didn't get cast. And then Thursday I got an e-mail thanking me for auditioning, but that I unfortunately was not cast.

I accepted the news much better than I thought I would. I felt satisfaction for having tried, and even though I really believed I was meant to be in this show, it was a healthy reminder that I can only control what I can control, and that casting is completely out of my hands. Last night, as I was deep into a short story by Tolstoy, I got a call from the stage manager. To my complete surprise and joy she called to ask if I would join the cast and that the first rehearsal is tonight. I am jumping up and down happy.

This most recent experience has been such a wonderful reminder that sometimes trying to accomplish something is all you need. It is a reminder that it really isn't over until it's over. Today my life takes a completely unexpected and exciting turn. RENT has been my dream show since I first heard the soundtrack back in 1996. I'm in the ensemble, which for this show means I'll be getting an amazing work out. This is the first fully staged musical production that I am doing since my junior year of high school. And I know, I just know, I'm going to tear it up.

I cannot think of a more excellent performance boot camp than being in this show will provide. While hope and optimism are deeply embedded into my blood, the experience of accepting failure (not that I ever felt like I failed, because I tried my best), and then being rewarded with surprise acceptance, well, it just makes the whole experience that much sweeter.

Choice has been on my mind a lot lately. Our lives are defined by the choices we make. Over the years I've made some pretty crazy ones. From dropping out of college and moving to NYC with a meager $300 in my bank accounting, to putting all my time and energy into The Bill of Rights project, to picking up and moving to South America, I can say with astounding enthusiasm that I would do it all over again.

So now comes the next chapter of choices. I tried out for my dream show and by some miracle I managed to get in. I wait on this next decision from Cornerstone with baited breath. I feel confident that I am doing as much as is in my power to create the future I long for. And while I still can't say where I'll be once I finish this degree, I am getting so close to attaining it, thus completing a goal that I set forth so many years ago.

In the weeks to come I will be sending a survey out into the blogger and facebook universes in regards to my Bill of Rights project, and the effect it has had on people over the last year and a half. It is my intention to return to this blog with regular entries and new insights. I know an absence of five months is a long time, but it was needed. Sometimes life needs to be lived without documentation. Moving forward though, I would like to focus deeply on what it is we chose to document, why these documents are important, and how it all connects to the ideas of both identity and community.

The next two months will be wildly busy for me, but also very important to the development of my ideas and practices. I am positively giddy with anticipation.

5 Days

2009-10-09T16:22:00.000-07:00

My time here is coming to an end. I am very happy to be leaving, but I realize I will miss this place. This time. This part of my life. Colombia is a wonderful place, and I look forward to my return visits, whenever they happen. What's funny is that since I bought my ticket I have seen some people I wish I'd gotten to spend a lot more time with.

The things I will miss most about Colombia: the stunningly beautiful nature in all directions, the amazingly awesome graffiti, the fresh bread, and the fruit. These are the things that have spoiled me. They are truly top notch, and worth making the trip down here for. I will also miss the people I've met. I know I have said in past posts that I made no solid connections here, and I realize that's completely inaccurate. I have met some really great people here, people that I have confidence will return to my life in time. It is the fact that most of them had so little time to spend with me, that prevented us from getting closer.

Just because I am leaving, does not mean this is the end. I am going to carry Bogota back with me. This has been a very important chapter, I have learned so much. I look forward to how the characters who have entered my life here return later down the road. I feel certain that they will be making return appearances.

These last days have been enjoyable and calm. I feel quiet and pensive. I will let these next few days wash over me. Before I know it, it will be time to start my life anew.

Where the heart is

2009-09-30T18:34:00.000-07:00

Last night, after finishing my most recent post, I bought my plane ticket home. The second the transaction was complete, a huge rush of doubt filled my whole body. I've been dealing with it all day. For someone as adventure loving and risk taking as me, why did I decided to come home a full two months early? What is it about these two months that make me want to run home?

The major answer does always return to me. After 10 months of being completely on my own, with no one but myself to answer to, I am ready to return to the fold. To embrace community, and to return to the land of structure, people, and forward motion. I have meet some truly wonderful people during my stay here, but sadly I have not gotten close with anyone. The kind of close that warms you, feeds you, and never makes you doubt how long it will last. It is true friendship that I lack here. And I discovered I have limit on how long I can go without it.

There's a part of me that feels like a wuss for cashing in my chips early. I mean, who gives up the chance to live in a foreign land for two months, anyway? I must accept that I might always feel that way, just a bit. But my heart is at home, and it's at home in a way I've never experienced before.

I can honestly say that I know what it means to be free. It is an incredible gift that I hope everyone gets to experience, even if only briefly. I know what free is now, I know I will not lose that by returning to my country. On the contrary, I feel that my time here is exactly the fuel I need to go home and take action, and discover freedom in a new sense.

So the choice has been made, the ticket has been bought. I think it's only natural to be freaked by this newest life decision, but I'm going to go ahead and trust my heart on this one. It hasn't failed me yet.

Traveling North

2009-09-29T17:09:00.000-07:00

Yes, yes, another big gap between posts. I've had my reasons. A major one being that I spent 8 days on the Caribbean coast of Colombia. Another being that I have been wrestling with a major life decision, that I am finally settled on.

Which to start with? How about the life decision, since it came first. I have decided, after long deliberation, that i will be returning home a full two months early. It went from being something I refused to consider, to something that was worth thinking about, to something I absolutely wanted to do, to examining which was a better use of time, and finally back to knowing it is the most logical, responsible, and satisfying decision I can make.

The conflict came with the end of the conference. When it ended I returned to the routine of sleeping until 11am, and then waking only to figure out just how I was going to fill the large number of vacant hours in my day. It was at this point that coming home began to feel appealing. I began to question the value of floating aimlessly for another two months, when I could go home, begin to move forward, and finally be back with close friends and family. It seemed pretty logical to me.

I decided that since I was going to go home ahead of schedule, I wanted to make one final big trip before I departed. Deciding I had my fill of mountains, and knowing many friends who had just gone, I realized the coast was calling my name loud and clear. In eight days I went to Cartagena, Santa Marta, Tayrona, and Tyganga. I had an amazing time and found cool people at every turn.

During my time on the coast I enjoyed conversations with people from France, Australia, Germany, Poland, Peru, Spain, South Africa, and the United States. I think I may even be forgetting a few. The caliber of travelers coming through Colombia is pretty impressive. I think it has a lot to do with Colombia rarely being at the top of people's list when it comes to picking a destination. So the traveler you do meet have already been many other places. It makes for great stories, and plenty to ponder.

My favorite stops were the last two. Tayrona is a huuuuge national park, with about a million beaches and nothing but jungle in the background. You could spend weeks getting lost in there. I spent three days swimming, sunning, hiking into the jungle to ancient ruins, and enjoying the hell out of the company I was in.

Tyganga is a wonderful tiny fishing town, you can walk the whole thing in maybe 20 minutes, and it just happens to be filled with an eclectic combination of tourists, ex-pats, and some pretty crazy characters. I bought a cd from this old man, the town musician, who serenaded us our first night there. There are excellent cheap restaurants and hotels too. While it's been around a long time, they are only now getting their first paved road along their main street. And the best part: the cheapest scuba diving in the world. It was a first for me, and it was SO COOL. For $50 you get training to use the equipment, two (45 minute) dives, a snack, a cool boat ride, and a video to remember the experience. It was worth every penny.

So then I came home. My time traveling was wonderful, and I relished in the change of pace and face. Because of this I again questioned whether or not I was serious about packing it in two months early. I approached the question from many angles, but when it came down to it, the answer was still the same. Basically I have the choice of blowing the rest of my savings, traipsing the country side solo, with the only hope for company being the fleeting encounters that the backpacker trail offers; OR, I could go home with money still in my pockets, back to the people I love dearly, and begin to move forward and build my life.

What it comes down to is being ready to return to reality. I'm sure I'd have fun traveling more, I'm sure I'd meet some great people, and have many the unexpected adventure. But I am also sure that that another two months of drifting will not help me feel less lonely, it will not make me more likely to start producing, and it most definitely will not provide me with a chance to make money and finish my degree.

I do not know what is waiting for me at home. I do know I am ready to be part of a community again. I am feeling the pull strong these days, and when that happens, it's always best to go with it. It may not be easy, but it will be home. And home is where my heart is. It is where I want to be.

There is more to say... much more

2009-09-03T21:53:00.001-07:00

I've been thinking about my last post ever since I posted it. My initial response is only the first dig. The work that I saw was difficult, and still worming its way through my brain. I don't want to create fluff pieces, I want to create something equally burrowing, but just in a more positive direction. I want to be proactive. I want to participate. I don't ever want to find myself in a place where i feel like life is happening to me way more than i am happening to it.

A lot of the performances are still working on me. I guess you could say they were rather effective. I still can't make the words come out right though. There are too many. I need to find the right channel. My brain feels hot and heavy. I need to keep pushing.

I've have been on vacation for too long. A gift this conference gave me is a wake up call. I've been wandering the desert. And it's good, I needed to be out there, there's been a lot to learn. But it is time I remember what it means to work my ass off. For ten very long days I did, and it was what I needed. The hardest thing about having nothing but free time is that you need to fill it yourself. And have only yourself to blame for wasting it.

I don't think I've wasted my time. But I do think it's about time I start producing. And more than just a blog every so often. My whole thing, when I started the Bill of Rights project last year, was about setting attainable goals for myself. Small things that added up to a lot. Well, it's time to start setting those goals, but make them just a bit bigger this time.

My goal is to treat these next four months as a semester in college. where i am my teacher and i set the rules. The trick is to challenge myself, to not let myself off too easy. I've got a film & literature class starting soon, spanish to learn, and even an exam on the American Dream. And my own work to create.

Self-discipline is a hell of a thing. It is my lesson for the moment. This blog has been banging about my mind all day, and these are the words that shook out. They are not the last, for there is a sea left to say. But this is what I have to share right now. It is what I'm working through. I know already this is going to be tough. But I will find my way. And when I do, I hope to tell you all about it.

The lighter side

2009-09-02T16:03:00.000-07:00

The conference has been over for a few days now, I've been processing ever since. I was very fortunate to be able to participate in such a wonderful and challenging program. It has left me exhausted, full, and eager for what lies ahead.

If I had to list my number one issue with the productions at Encuentro, it would be the complete lack of hope and positivity. There was so much focus on the grim, suffering, oppressed part of life. So much to do with the disappeared, the pain of women, the terrible struggles of a cruel world. And I understand that, there is certainly plenty of subject matter. But there was not one piece that was created to empower, to shine light, to give hope. And I need to ask why that is? Is it just because it's not as dramatic? Do we really believe there is nothing to celebrate, nothing that can make us proud to be American?

Everything I saw was meant to make me feel bad, raw, guilty, shocked, confused, or uncomfortable. I saw women in various forms of bondage; image after image of suffering and pain. I saw an incredible instillation in a slaughter house that attacked each and every one of my senses, a haunted house made from real life images. I saw a heated debate about the drug war while they passed out real cocaine to the audience. and i even saw a woman sew her vagina shut, attach fake hair to it, attach a cow bell to that and swing it around knocking over everything in her path.

This work has a right to exist, and while I don't like some of it (especially the vagina lady) I can appreciate it. But it left me with a hole. It left me craving the lighter side. It left me wondering how this could possibly be all there is to progressive experimental art. Where are the women who haven't suffered? The ones who took control of their lives, made great choices, the ones who smashed through glass ceilings and had a great time doing it? I know they exist, I shared this experience with them. I am one of them.

This has left me with a mission. I know now what I need to write. I'm a positive person, who has taken advantage of every resource I could get my hands on, and I have been living my life my way. Say what you will about America, but freedom is not just a catch phrase, it is, was, and always will be our foundation. My foundation. It is true, I have never suffered any truly horrible injustice. While I have struggled, it has not been in the way that leaves one hollow, it has only been in the way that has made me stronger, and more ready for what comes next.

I want to write something for those of us who don't think we are doomed. Who don't believe that pain and suffering are the most basic parts of human existence. I feel only one side of the conversation was represented at this Encuentro, or at least only one side that resonated.

So I must get to work. The ideas are flying, I need only to catch them. It is my goal to submit something for the next Encuentro, about what it really means to be a citizen. What it means to not let the past paralyze me, but rather be my propeller. Yes, there is a world of pain out there, but there is also a world of joy. It is that joy that I want to, that i am meant to, focus on.

This is not to say that the whole conference was doom and gloom. I absolutely loved the workshops, and many of the lectures were quite interesting. There was even an event called a long table that was created for us to speak our minds and converse with others. My brain has absorbed so much in the past two weeks, and it is the kind of stuff that will keep working itself out for years to come. I can understand why the subject matter was so heavy, especially in a country as conflict ridden as Colombia. But I can't help but think that the focus must shift. I must help it shift.

The people at this thing, they are all doing great things. Let's focus on them. Let's make art for and about them. Let's illuminate the world of the possibilities that exist when we are not afraid, but rather excited to live.

Collective Creation

2009-08-24T14:31:00.001-07:00

Wow. I knew this conference was going to be a big deal, but really, the effects are pretty immediate. I remember why i love theater so much. Never, in my life, have i been surrounded by such an enormous number of passionate, intelligent, and kind people. It's the conversations I'm having that are making this thing real. And the fantastic workshops. I took one today with Michael John Garces, the artistic director at Cornerstone Theater Company in Los Angeles.

It was my dream workshop. We did a series of exercises that were all about finding common ground. He divided the space into 4 groups (ex: visual, text, body, and music; youngest, middle, only, and oldest child) and then we picked one and had to discover 3 things in common with the others in our group, then share with everyone what we learned. There were other great exercises too, but I'd be writing forever if I did play by plays. Anyway, it was a real sharing of spirits. Such a great way to get to know people, and I imagine a fantastic way to begin a working process. I have to do my research now, but where I want to go next is beginning to focus.

I also had a great Augusto Boal workshop, taught by someone who worked with him intensively. I forgot how amazing it is to just play. All the games we played in his workshop I have done before, but that didn't matter because it is the kind of thing that's fresh and new every time. And when you have such fun people to play with, it makes the experience that much more special. It was a huge workshop, 37 people, but it worked out well. It helped that the space we were working in was beautiful.

I'm falling in love with La National's campus all over again. It is such a beautiful campus, absolutely bursting with large beautiful work spaces. And covered in graffiti. I'm planning to do a photo album just from there. I really do think of it as my university. I've done workshops there, yoga there, even attempted language exchange for a while; after this week I know i will be even more attached to it.

Each day has felt like a week. There are programs running from 9 am until 12am every day. The first three days I went to everything. Today I decided what I needed more than another lecture or two, was to come home, and digest what's been happening, before going back at 8pm to go see stuff and party after. There is a very cool club where the late night performances are. It has no sign out front, so well hidden I couldn't find it the first night, but then inside it's this old mansion, converted into a cabaret lounge, including a restaurant with excellent cheap food. It's called Mapa Theatro.

I'm getting to see Bogota in a whole knew way. And I feel like the fact that I've lived here since January give me more confidence with everyone in the conference. I had to work not to get intimidated. It was hard at first, but it's gotten much easier in the past two days. Everyone is so smart and interesting. I realize I'm meant to be here. While their paths may have included tons more traveling or a much better education, I've had my own path and my own real life education.

Today in the workshop, we were using a space that was both inside and outside, a courtyard in the most beautiful academic building I've even seen. Our teacher asked us to think of the space as a map, and to put ourselves on the map; where we think we are, at this moment. We managed to spread out using nearly the whole space. In my workshop today of 14 people, Colombia, Ecuador, Mexico, Spain, Canada, and the USA were all represented.

I'm coming together with my peers. And it is good. Let's see what the next five days bring.

Full Circle

2009-08-20T12:35:00.000-07:00

Wow, it's been a long time. Closing in on two months. I was occupied. Very occupied. And I've still got 9 days to go. I've spent quality with every one who is important to me. Averaging 2 visits a day, I could have used more time with everyone, but the fact that I connected with so many, and that I even had those people to connect with, that's really something.

I am back in Bogota now. I arrived last night, and I begin my Encuentro conference tomorrow at 10am. How I will manage to encompass all that is being processed through my veins since last I updated, I don't know. But, I have every intention of giving it my best shot. I think it's best to start from the beginning.

family vacation
I would have liked to do an entry just on this part of the trip, but something always got in my way. The whole being surrounded by people thing makes it difficult. And this post, being of a personal nature, made the task especially hard.

When my sisters arrived to Bogota on July 3rd, it became the first complete reunion in Colombia since 1991. It had been 19 years since we'd all traveled together. So really, it felt like the first time. I think I realize how much I love my family, and how lucky I am to have them, a little more every time I see them. And I am constantly reminded how far we've come. The concept of family, these people who you've known since birth (theirs or yours), and who you will continue to learn and grow with for the span of your life. It's just really incredible, and I become more amazed by it with time.

We divided our time between Bogota and traveling to the Santander region. My dad took off on his own first, while my mom and sisters shared time in Bogota going to some markets and the top of a mountain where there's a great view of the southern part of the city. We took a bus 7 hours, traveling north through the mountains to a very busy town called San Gil. It was our home base for two other trips we took.

The first trip was a 5 mile hike down a mountain path that was origianally built between two colonial towns hundreds of years ago. The walk had a view of a stunning valley and lots of interesting things to see along the way. Like old stone walls, happy goats, and a plant that couldn't decide if it was a cactus or a tree. We barely encountered anyone along the trail, so we could really enjoy the awesome beauty and peacefulness that enveloped us.

The next day we went to what we called canyon disneyland, but it's actually called Chicamocha. It's this park in the middle of a gigantic canyon that goes on for miles. We took a four mile cable car ride, and my sisters and I did a zipline along the side of the canyon. There was also this gigantic dynamic piece of art that depicted the revolution. It wasso much to feast the eyes upon. Some much to take in. Our final day all together we went to San Gil's city park. That just happened to look like a tropical paradise. Once inside, you'd never guess there was a huge city outside the lush green. It was a great way to end our trip together.

From there I took my sisters to Villa de Leyva. They'd heard me go on and on, and want to see for themselves. We crammed all we could into two days. We might have stayed longer, but due to my mom leaving sooner than us, and also Villa De Leyva getting into festival mode, we decided it was time to go home. Not before eating some amazing pizza and Lebanese food, and getting to the blue pools, waterfall, and ruins though.

When we got back to Bogota my sisters and I managed to do a healthy mix of sight seeing and being lazy. They brought me tons of TV on a hard drive, and since I've been so American TV deprived since being here, we really indulged. The shows of choice being Dexter and Rescue Me. I've already said how awesome my family is, but I have to go further and say how lucky I am to have two sisters and awesome as mine. Being around them reminded me just how special we are. And super smart. There was one night my sisters actually got into this in-depth arguement about the oxford comma. It was just one of those reminders of how i was brought up, and why my brain works the way it does. They challenge me, and more over, they have made me crave challenge.

When my one sister and mother left, then it was just my other sister and father left. We had two more weeks. The main highlights of that time were a trip to Apulo (my sister's first time), and a hiking/camping trip with my sister. Those were really great times. There was A LOT of mountain hiking involved. And the trip with my sister we encountered two crazy hugging ladies... but perhaps that's a story for another time.

So I got to talk, and laugh, and enjoy my family's company in a very big way. Our trip together is a special one, one that clued us all into how much we have all grown. The fact they all found the time to come here and make this trip possible is huge, and I think we are all the closer for it.

home sweet home
So finally, after so much anticipation, I got to go home. For the first two days I had a permanent grin on my face, just from being so happy. I miss home so much, and two weeks weren't nearly enough, but I sure did my best to fit everyone in. The trip home was a nightmare, I was traveling from 6:30 a.m. to 12:30 a.m, but the night ended up with me sleeping in my own bed in my bedroom, and wow, did it feel good to wake up there.

I spent one day at Musikfest and saw some old friends, then left for NYC early the next morning. I proceeded to visit with one person after another, seeing as many as three or four people a day, jumping in and out of manhattan, queens, and brooklyn, sometimes all in the same day. It was a different kind of coming home, the kind that makes me know I'm supposed to get back there. My friends did such an amazing job of welcoming me home. I was cooked one delicious meal after another, and also ate at my old favorites, and discovered the best pad thai i've ever had in my life.

It was a very cheap week by new york standards. Due to the generosity of my friends I managed to spend less than $100 in 8 days. It helps that I spent all my time just wandering the city streets, lounging in parks, and in the comfort of my friends' homes. And not only that, but I also received several unexpected gifts during my stay. All things that friends just had that they decided I needed more. The gifts include a nalgene bottle, a strapless bra, a small moleskin notebook, a hair clip, and a pair of orange Kate Spade heels. There are stories behind all of them. I've spoken before about how I feel I keep receiving gifts during this journey, it really meant something to me that my trip to new york presented me with so many tangible ones.

On another note, I checked up on a bunch of places I put my bill of rights sticks, and and happy to announce that several of them are still posted in places. Which means people are still reading it. Yay!

I came home late friday night, and then went to a breakfast meeting bright and early the next day. The meeting was with two of my oldest (in terms of how long i've known them, not age) theater teachers, their significant others, a very old friend and his girlfriend, and this boy who I used to babysit when he was 8. He is now 20. It was such a dynamic group of people. The one teacher I hadn't spoke to in at least 10 years, and it was her son who I babysat. I reached out to her because I knew she had such an influence on my development, and I know moving forward in my life, these are the people I want to make sure are still in it, and affecting me for years to come.

The rest of my trip was more visiting. All with people i've known since my early teens or longer. I got to spend some time with the boy I used to babysit, and while it was so wild that he wasn't 8 anymore, it made me proud to see what an independent and intelligent young man he's turning into. I ended my home time with a trip to my oldest friends in all the world. I've known them for 20 years now. They are sisters, we went to elementary together, and now the one is coming up on her one year anniversary and living in a house her and her husband built together.

The whole trip was about people, and how we all support each other. Friends, mentors, family. They are very real and powerful forces. They are the embodiment of hope. The way
I know there will be a future. A good one. I am an independent person, I always have been. But this whole trip, one of the biggest things it taught me, is that I while I am able to make myself happy, I live for the connection to others. My life is meant to intertwine with yours. There really is nothing better than the time we share with each other. I've done my best to not use names in my blogs, but you know who you are. Thank you. From the bottom of my heart, thank you.

the next step
Tomorrow is my future. Tomorrow I start a new adventure. I looked at the schedule for this conference and I couldn't be more excited. The titles for some workshops I am taking are : "Body, Time, Space" , "Sound, Praxis, and citizenship", and "Personal legacy: memory, the body, and ancestral manifestation". I have no idea what these next nine days are gonna do to me, but they are clearly going to do something. I want this to be my spring board, the thing that throws me in a direction.

I plan to work hard at my online course work in the coming semester, but most of all I want to improve both my spanish and my diet. The first half of my trip was all about floating, all about just going with the flow and learning the true meaning of living day to day. This half is different. I have four months here. Four more months to do everything i can to keep my life heading in a healthy, positive, and productive direction. That means focus. Discipline. I need to remember what those words mean. And how to still have a blast in the process.

I am learning valuable lessons on how to be a happy and healthy human being. And just like all lessons, practice is the key.

heavy

2009-07-02T16:58:00.000-07:00

So today's blog will be taking on a bit of a different mood. I've been avoiding writing this for a few days now. Not because there isn't anything to say, but because there is so much. I got home two days ago from an amazing trip to a country house in Apulo. It was a truly wonderful trip that gave me further appreciation for my situation, a chance to spend quality time with my family and new friends, and the pleasure of eating the best food I've had during my time here. Really, a spectacular trip, if only it weren't shadowed by the death of a family member, the deaths of way too many celebrities, my teeth giving me a lot of trouble, and the panicked escape from a burning car.

It's hard to know where to start. This week has left me pondering my own mortality in a way I haven't before. And really, it's not my own death that I fear, but the death of the people who are closest to me. There are people in my life who fill me with life, joy, and meaning. They fill in the cracks of my existence, make me whole. I have been very fortunate that I have never experienced a truly significant loss, and being 24 years old, that's quite something. But weeks like this make me realize that luck will run out eventually, and the best i can do is have some sort of understanding and acceptance of that.

I went to the funeral today for a second cousin I never met, but I know his family well, and they are really wonderful people. It was my first real funeral, complete with a trip to the cemetery, where we watched as they filled the grave with dirt and covered it in flowers. Meanwhile my mother was telling me how she prefered the funerals where it was more a celebration of the life rather than the deep mourning of the passing. I have to say, I whole-heartedly agree with her.

And then there is the teeth and car factors that have also played into my whole state of being right now. My biggest fear is losing my teeth and this weekend I broke one and managed to get meat stuck deep into the gums of another so I was in some pretty serious pain. And it was on the way home from this wonderful weekend that the car we were in started slowing down as we were going up a large mountain until it stopped. By the time it stopped we were surrounded in a cloud of smoke and within a minute or two the hood was on fire. We jumped out of the car fast, but I, being in the very very back, couldn't get the seat to fold down so i ended up jumping over the top and out. People did stop and the fire was put out within a few minutes, but the fear was already deep. There was plenty of panic and racing hearts, and also the cold of being on top of a mountain dressed for hot weather.

The good thing is that through all of this, no one was hurt, everyone is in one piece. While this has all been very intense, I must take refuge in the fact that nothing truly tragic (at least to all those close to me) has passed. But I do think that all of this is a sign to me that I must pay attention. I must appreciate the complexities of life, and accept that with the good comes the bad. I can't shake the feeling that I am being prepared for darker skies ahead.

But luckily, there is a whole lot of good in my life, and for all of it I give thanks. This weekend lasted from Thursday to Tuesday, and they were some really great days. There was perfect weather, fantastic company, the magical vibe of being nuzzled in the mountains and being surrounded by fruit trees, a sky full of stars at night, and the pleasure of getting to read, swim, and lay with out one worry in my head. I discovered there is an unlimited combination of laying... laying near the pool, in the pool, on the pool, in the hammock, on the couch, in the grass... and every few hours someone would bring me a cold glass of fresh lemonade. Everyone should get a chance to live that way, if only for a few days. Then you throw in a book (currently reading Women in Love by D.H. Lawrence) and really there is no end to the awesomeness of it all.

And the food! We had big breakfasts of eggs mixed with vegetables, fresh fruit, fresh bread, fresh butter, freshly squeezed oranage juice, and hot chocolate to top it all off. There were two lunches that were particularly noteworthy. One was a beef roast, chorizo sausage, fried yucca, plantains, aji (which is kind of like salsa but a million times better), arepa, and salad. The next day was a pork roast with potatoes arepa con queso, salad, and some seriously excellent sauces. Everything was fresh fresh fresh, a lot of it grown right on the property, and absolutely delicious.

These past few days have been heavy, and leave me quite pensive. But the good thing is that it hasn't put the slightest damper on my optimism and hope for better things ahead. It has left me more grateful than ever for my amazing family, and my rich and fulfilling life. Every day is such a gift. I have always believed that I will live an extremely long life, and I still believe that. These past few days have sobered me up and made me deal with the fact that there will always be an equilibrium. There will always be bad days, it is part of living. Thank god the good days vastly out weigh the bad ones.

Tomorrow my sisters come. Thus ensuring I have some seriously spectacular days ahead.

Family and Friends time

2009-06-21T08:58:00.000-07:00

This is going to be a short one, but I wanted to check in and say that all is well on my end. My parents have arrived safe and sound. It's been wonderful to see them, and I think we'll have a good time while they are here. Yesterday was a great day. We did some quality visiting in the morning and had a fantastic lunch of rice, beans, and platano. Then we visited with my dad's best friend, after which I had ice cream for dinner with my mom and abuelita. I topped the night of with dancing and rocking out with a new friend from my art class.

I think I've been learning a lot about how to enjoy whatever company I'm in. I think there were plenty of things a few years ago I would have been much more impatient about, but these days annoying things don't seem a big deal, and are overshadowed by the great company I am in. The night out was a great realization in this. It was the second time my new friend and I have hung out outside of class, and we went to a rock bar where her friends were playing. Neither one of us felt like drinking, but this place had some excellent alcohol free cocktails so we were happy. The band was decent, they were a rock cover band, though they started 2 and half hours late and then took an hour break in between sets. Also the waitress, I'm pretty sure, was one of the drunkest people in the place. The service was terrible, and it took over half an hour to settle our bill. Even though the night involved lots of waiting, dealing with a weird guy who kept trying to talk to us and buy us drinks, and we didn't drink a drop of booze, I had a fantastic time. I'm finally making some real friends, and this new one is just really cool, and we seem to have tons in common. I've been dancing so much salsa since I've been here, I think I forgot how good it feels just to rock my heart out.

I think today is going to be a mellow day. Nice lunch, perhaps a walk in the park. Which sounds good to me. I don't know how long until my next update, I'll try to keep up. Even now I don't have my normal privacy, so I'm going to get going. But rest assured that once I do update, it will be with some fun news. For now I'm going to stop attempting to concentrate while being surrounded by people.

Rainy days, dentists, and the end of a chapter

2009-06-16T16:38:00.000-07:00

This past week has been great. It's been a healthy mix of solitude, getting important things done, and enjoying the company of others. I finished reading "The English Patient" which was pretty good, and now I have started reading "Jazz" by Toni Morrison and am already completely in love. I think being here has actually given me a greater appreciation for the english language. I'm becoming more enamored with its complexity and beauty. Spanish is quite beautiful too, and I intend to keep getting better at it, but english will always be my native tongue, and I'm falling in love with it more each day.

It's been a very rainy week, and it's actually been nice. I always go through phases where I'm more introverted than others, and this week has been a very even mix of social and private megg. I've gotten to know my new friends better, and like them more every time I've seen them. I've also gotten to see the friends I've had since I've been here twice. This thursday there is going to be an Andy Warhol exhibit openning downtown, and I'm hoping it'll be the perfect opportunity to bring all of these friends together and enjoy one last night before a new chapter of my life begins.

My parents arrive friday, and I have to say, I'm starting to get really excited. Family always bring a big wave of emotion and motion, and I know I've been nervous in anticipation, but the closer it's getting, the more I realize how wonderful it's going to be to reunite, especially now. And once they get here, my real summer begins. It's going to be a whirlwind of events from now until September and I fully intend to enjoy every last drop.

I find there's nothing that makes me feel like an adult quite like voluntarily going to the dentist and getting work done. It something I absolutely hate, and always dread, but the older I get the more I value a healthy mouth and the more important it is to take care of... even when it means spending money i really rather not spend, especially on something as unfun as dental work. The upside is that it's much cheaper here and we have an excellent family dentist. Currently my face is still numb from the visit I made today.

These last five and a half months have been a very precious and gratifying period for me. I've gotten a lot done, become more well read, traveled, and experienced. They have left me feeling refreshed, re-newed, and absolutely ready for whatever comes next.

Not the average yoga class

2009-06-10T15:04:00.000-07:00

So I got tear gassed today. It was a first for me. And to think I was this close from not going to yoga today.

When I woke up this morning the sky was completely clouded over and it had just stopped raining. I debated forgoing yoga for the day, but since by the time it was time to go there was a lot of blue sky and sun I decided to take my chances. When I got to the National University, there was a big protest going on. I'm pretty sure it had to do with tuition hikes, though I have far from the full story.

So anyway, we're doing yoga, and the sky is managing to be raining and shining simulatenously, which was odd, but it wasn't raining hard enough to scare me off. Then I see about five guys running down the street with big slabs of plywood and hoods over their heads, I imagine they were on their way to make a barricade. A couple minutes after that I hear about 5 or 6 loud blasts fired. And a few seconds after that I see a couple hundred people running down the street with a big cloud of gas following behind them. I gathered up my stuff pretty quick, but not fast enough that i didn't get hit with a big whiff of the stuff. For those of you wondering, tear gas makes your eyes sting like hell, and makes it hard to breathe. It was all pretty wild, and honestly, i'm just sad I didn't have my camera.

On the bus home it started to downpour. Seems like yoga was just not meant to be. But now I am off to my drawing class. I just wanted to report this strange and new experience before I forget.

No worries though, I'm totally fine.

Inside

2009-06-07T13:26:00.000-07:00

Things on my end are wonderful as usual. The hike I went on last week ended up being just the right about of hard. The first climb was intense, but after that it was wonderful. The paramo was beautiful, I loved that I felt so far from civilization. And I met some great people. There were two couples in particular that I hope to see a lot more of. One couple was Dutch, the other colombian, and they are all architects. The Dutch couple had a party on friday, so it was a great chance to get to know them better, practice my spanish, and dance dance dance.

This has been an inside kind of week. I've been feeling quiet, pensive, and apprehensive for what comes next. The arrival of my parents is less than two weeks away, and I'm incredibly excited to see them, but also super aware that my whole trip is about to change. The whole pace of my life is about to change, and I can't help but thinking, my whole insides are about to change.

Anticipation is a funny thing. It rarely has anything to do with the events themselves, and how you picture things going is never what actually happens. But I am about to have family time in a way I haven't ever had before. My parents come, and then my sisters after that. I will get a chance to re-meet the people who are most important to me.

Also, right after this very important family trip, I will be going home and seeing all my friends again. I'll be going home. For two short weeks. There is so much much I am homesick for, and I intend on making the very most of it. It's hard not to be sad that I won't have more time there though. And then I'm back in Colombia and right away I have my 9 day Encuentro conference.

These next three months are going to be huge. There's no way to prepare, no way to know what's coming. In my heart of hearts, I know I will walk away knowing all kinds of things that I didn't before. This trip keeps getting bigger and better. Having these next two weeks is good. It's giving me some much needed alone time right before I am thrown into this next phase of sharing.

Unexpected Adventure

2009-05-28T10:03:00.000-07:00

This past week has been great. It has gone between lazy and action packed. This week's activities included reading, some visiting with friends, yoga and art class, climbing up and down a mountain, and a quest for goat cheese.

The last two are the most interesting so let's start there. The quest for goat cheese was the biggest success, and most exciting thing for me. Anyone who knows me knows my love for cheese runs deep, and that goat cheese is my favorite of all. Ever since I arrived here I've kept my eyes open for it, with no success. When I ask about it people give me weird looks and almost laugh when they say no. It makes no sense to me how in a country where there's lots of goats, no one understands the wonder of their cheese. But perhaps that's just me.

So, Saturday morning I woke up thinking about what I was going to do that day. While at breakfast my grandparents, being as sweet as they are, had a couple of newspaper articles about stuff I could do in the next few days. Next to the article they were trying to show me on horseback riding there was an article about some sort of tour through the towns near Bogota. It mentioned as one of the stops a goat farm where they make cheese, yogurt, and milk. It didn't give a name of the place, or an address, all I had to go on was the it was in Cajica, close to the train. Having driven through Cajica on my way to Tabio I knew that it wasn't a very big town, and only 45 minutes away, so I figured how hard could it be to find, right? Well, turns out pretty hard.

My grandmother came with me and we set off around 11 or so. When we got into Cajica we just started asking people. No one knew anything about it. We must have asked at least ten people for directions. Lucky for us we did have a phone number from the article to call, and when they finally answered the phone they were able to tell us that the farm was located in, i kid you not, "the mysterious sector," near the road that continues into the next town. Well, 4 more people later we finally found the right road and made our way to the farm.

The man running the place is German but he's been living in Colombia for 25 years. He has 120 goats. He provides all the cheese to the fancier resturants in the city. He introduced us to the goats, who seemed to love him a lot, and then showed us where the goats were milked and where they make the cheese. So, I bought a couple packs of it, and I am happy to report it's delicious. I have exciting plans to use one pack to make a super amazing pizza this weekend, I can't wait!

And then the mountain climing. I got a call sunday night from one of my cousins who I'd only seen one since I'd been here, inviting me to climb a mountain. I didn't ask any questions, which I probably should have, but I said okay and then met up with her at 10:30 the next day. We spent the next two hours waiting for her friends to show up, and then took another hour to get to the mountain, the enterance of which was the national park here in Bogota. We didn't start up the mountain until around 1:30, which is pretty late, because then you are racing the sun.

An this was a serious climb. While the it wasn't as long as the one I did a few weeks back, there were parts of it that really were straight up. Climbing up up rock face, grabbing on tree roots, that sort of thing. Luckily there was no mud. And either I'm in way better shape, or something about the climb was easier because it didn't hurt nearly as much as last time.

The group that I was with was a fun loving bunch who were all a bit reckless, and were practically chain smoking the entire climb. Though they were in impressive shape, there were a few who were able to go up the mountain at a run, as if it was nothing. The view from the top was amazing, I got to see a nice chunk of the cityscape. And once we got to the top we started going down immediately, arriving at a waterfall tucked away in the mountain side. It was super secluded, and we were the only ones there. They built a fire, and some of them were crazy enough to swim in the freezing water. They had brought along this stuff called Molipollo, which is this chicken product that you squeeze out from a tube onto a stick. I've eated some strange stuff since I've been here, but something about liquid chicken product was just too icky for me, I only had the tiniest bit.

So there we were, chilling out by the waterfall and I could see the sun going down, and fast. It was making me nervous since I knew the climb we had ahead of us was steep, but because I was only one of nine I knew I just had to go with the flow and hope none of them had a death wish. We didn't start back up the mountain until after 5, and when we got to the top the sun was well on its way to setting, and even knowing that they stopped to have a couple cigarettes. The climb down really was a race with the sun, and the sun totally won. It didn't help that we lost one of our party members about half way down, the one who was the most drunk (did i mention the entire box of aguadiente they had at the waterfall?). After about 10 minutes or so we found him, by then the sun was set. By the time we got to the bottom it was completely dark. Which made it hard, and my heart pound just a bit faster. But I will say, getting to watch the sunset, and the lights from the city turn on from atop the mountain, that was really amazing.

The rest of the week was great too. I got to spend time with my friends, and Lucia even taught me how to do macrome, which is a craft with yarn. The way she talked about it, how making one was like giving birth, and how it was one thing in the world she absolutely loved, and how she was going to save the world doing it, it was just so beautiful. Being witness to the creative process is a very special thing. I look forward to making one of my own. And lots of yoga, and doing art. It's been great to flex those muscles again. My art class is a lot about technique, which is something I need, it's great to see how much better I'm getting in just a few short weeks.

Time is passing so fast, it's hard to believe we are already on the brink of June. I am going on a big hike this Sunday with the group I went with a view weeks back. We are going to the birth place of the Bogota river, which is something like 3500 meters up in the mountains, in the paramo. Paramo, I have learned is the part of the mountain from 3000 to 4000 meters, it's the part right before the ice caps. I have a feeling it will prove to be an excellent adventure. I'll let you know.

Until then...

Being Back

2009-05-21T12:39:00.000-07:00

I've been back in Bogota for a week and a half now, and I can say I feel a difference. It's hard to explain how, except that I know it is within myself, obviously it's the same city. I have been thinking about where I would like to go next. I'm currently waiting to hear back from the walking group I did my hike with. There is a three day hike this upcoming weekend, but as of tuesday there weren't enough people signed up for it to happen, I'm really hoping that it will. I don't know too much about it other than it's in some place hot, and we are visiting emerald mines and waterfalls, among other things. I've got my fingers crossed.

But being in the city is good too. I've been feeling productive, but in an excellent sort of lazy way. Ever since my trip I've started waking up earlier just naturally. Which is good, because I was getting a silly amount of sleep there for a while. I finished my book on sunday, it ended just as it should. It's definitely the longest book I ever read, coming in at 719 pages. I've also been drawing and painting, some stuff for my class, and then other things just for me. And I've finally cracked the books for this history course that involves reading 5 text books, at the end of which I can take an exam that is 3 essay questions. The pay off is that if I pass it's worth 6 college credits.

There's no doubt that my life is incredibly easy right now, and I don't take that for granted. I do like that I feel productive with my days. Even though my pace is definitely on the slow side, each day I am getting things done. Today my productivity included getting a yellow fever vaccine, buying some art supplies for my painting class tomorrow, and getting some history read. Tonight I plan to finish up a painting I started, but right now I'm not in the mood.

Obviously not as exciting as galavanting through the country side, but hey, not every week can be an adventure. My parents will be here in a month, and that is when I think some real traveling will begin. It's nice to know I've still got plenty of adventure left. For now, I will enjoy the quiet.

One week in Villa De Leyva

2009-05-12T08:57:00.000-07:00

(Warning: this is a long one)

Well, I'm back in Bogota, and missing Villa De Leyva already. It was one of those special weeks that I'm not likely to forget, probably ever. The trip went so much better than I could have imagined, I didn't have a single problem or disappointment the whole week, which I think is pretty amazing. And more than that, I really did feel like I got away, entered another world, and got to make new friends that I think I will know for years to come.

I want to post more pictures here, but I'm having some technical difficulties, but at least here you can see the town square and the hotel where I stayed. This is what I got to wake up to every day for the past week. I really can't recommend this town enough for anyone trying to get as far away from the real world as they can. It's a town full of kind people, who all know each other, and who all say hello when they pass each other on the street. I don't know if it's just because I got really lucky, or because the people there really are that welcoming, but I felt quite taken care of, and was treated like I was part of the family everywhere I went.

I got to do plenty while I was there, and there's still tons left to do should I return, I did my best to be active while still keeping the sleepy rhythm that surrounded me like a big hug. I got to write about the Pozos Azules (sapphire pools) and the fosil museum when they happened, now I'm going to try and fill in the rest of the week.

Wednesday I got up pretty early, had a big breakfast and then set out on foot. My destination was this ancient astrological site called Infiernito, that was about 5km outside of town, walking down a dirt road. Almost as soon as I set out on the path thunder started rumbling from all parts. From the experience I had the day before I decided that there was a good chance the rain would hold off until the afternoon so I took my chances and kept going. I made it there surprisingly fast, and took some fun pictures. From what I understand, this was the ancient culture of the Muisca's version of stonehendge. What made me have to laugh was that surrounding the main bulk of the ruins were all these stones, around 12 feet high, all shaped unmistakably like a penis. And there had to be at least 20 or 30 of them around the site. It was a fun place to sit for a while and take pictures. Though because of the approaching storm I didn't stay super long. On my way back to town I got "accompanied" by this little 15 year old kid on a bike that for around 2 km asked me question after question, I'm pretty sure in preparation of making me his wife. Questions like if I had a boyfriend, do I have kids, how many kids do I want, can I cook, what can I cook... on and on. Perfectly harmless, and of course I gave him no information, but eventually I shook him off and went on my way. As soon as I got back to my room it began to down pour and didn't stop til late that night.

That night I got in touch with an old friend of my good friend here in Bogota. This began the rest of my trip and led to many fun and unexpected times. It was a man and his wife in their 40's, they own two shops right in the center of town. That night I got to meet with them in their shop and talked for a good long time. When it was time for dinner I went on my way and made plans to meet up with them the next day.

Thursday I set out around 10am on horseback. Such a great time, though if I had it to do over again I would have only gone for two hours instead of three, my back was killing me for two days after the ride. But we road through the desert for a long time, which was quite stunning. I didn't get a ton of photos though since I was working hard to stay on the horse. We arrived at an Ostrich farm, which was cool, but overpriced for what it was. It was a beautiful ride though, and a great way to see the area. And then that night...

I met up with my two new friends, plus one of their friends who they told me was at my service to guide me wherever I wanted to go the next day. They took me to a really neat old monestary turned museum, and then to the same cactus garden I had visited my second day, but I got to experience it in a completely different way. We went at sunset, and they were friends with the guy who owned the thing and lived on the land. There was a labrinyth made of stones that I had seen went I went, but this time we did a ritual that involved a fire and incense and walking the "labrinyth of solutions" by the light of the full moon with lighting flashing softly over the mountains. The whole thing took close to an hour and then we went inside, lit a fire, and drank agua de panella and talked for a while. When we got back into town they treated me to the best pizza I've had since I've been here. Quite the special day.

Friday I set out to find a waterfall tucked away in the countryside with my own personal guide. it required half an hour on the bus, and then another couple kilometers on foot, down some dirt roads, past many pastures that were postively bursting with magic mushrooms (it's something villa de leyva is known for) and then down down down a red and orange mountain side, through a big field. This put us directly at the mouth of the fall. It was so powerful and great. Because of the way the water flowed I actually got to sit at the top of the fall. It gave me the feeling of being on top of the world.

Once we returned I met up with my new friends who invited me over to their house for lunch. Their house was so pretty and completely in the middle of nowhere. We had such a great time, talking, introducing each other to music, playing hackie sack, and dancing the night away. I felt immediately at home, had the best time, and I ended up spending the night.

In the morning they brought me back to town, the first smell to fill my nostrils was the sweet scent of pound cake baking in the bakery near by. I bought a small one while it was still piping hot, and then went to the farmers market and bought a pound of the biggest fattest sweetest purple grapes. Since it was my last full day, and I had seen everything I wanted to, I decided to take my treats and go back to the sapphire pools. There I wasted away the afternoon reading, drawing, writing, eating, and meditating. The cake and grapes lasted me all day, and ended up being the only things I needed. Talk about a truly luxurious day of simple pleasures.

I spent a few hours hanging out with my new friends that night, I got to meet more of their friends and even got a chance to dance with, what I was told and fully believe, the best dancer in Villa De Leyva. I turned in early and then packed up to leave the next morning. I stopped by the shop on my way out of town, and ended up hanging out with them there until about 2, when I decided I really needed to get on my way. They made sure to let me know that I was welcome back any time, and there were many more places they wanted to take me when I returned. And they even made me a gift of a hackie sack, with the understanding that I am to practice so the next time I come we can play more.

I have written time and time again how blessed I feel to be here. This past week, it really did a lot to drive that point home. I feel so deeply that I am on the right path, and that I'm exactly where I am supposed to be. I have been getting sign after sign after sign that tells me to relax, enjoy, and keep doing what I'm doing. And I intend on doing just that. The time I have here is sacred, and will be held close to my heart for as long as I live. For that, I am sure.

Days One and Two

2009-05-05T18:05:00.000-07:00

Well Villa De Leyva is beautiful. I had a really great day and I wanted to write a little about it since I´m sure i´ll forget to write about so much by the time I get home.

I got in yesterday at around noon and found my hotel with little trouble. I´m staying at this place run by two retired professors who are super nice and gave me a guidebook and lots of information to help me plan my trip. The hotel is beautiful, my room is on the second floor at the end of the hall with a great view of the western mountainside. It is pretty crazy to think it is only costing me around $11 a night. I did a lot of wondering yesterday and looked into other hotels to see what kind of options I had and was pleased to find I have gotten the best deal where I am.

The town really makes you feel like you have walked into another century. It was founded in the 1500s and all the archetechture is spanish colonial and all the streets, including the biggest main plaza in the country, are all cobblestone. Incredibly beautiful to feast the eyes upon, though not so great at making my feet happy. I suppose you can´t have everything.

This morning I woke up early and had breakfast at the hotel. Two eggs, fresh bread, freshly squeezed orange juice, hot chocolate, crackers, and a hunk of cheese for 4000 pesos... which is maybe about $1.80 american. I think that is a pretty great deal, even in these parts. And then after breakfast the real fun began.

I decided to take a road out of town in the direction of Santa Sofia which is about 23 kilometers away. The first stop I made was my favorite, and perhaps even some place I would like to go back to if I have time. About 3 km from my starting point I arrived at these amazing natural sapphire pools that formed who knows how long ago. Imagine these stunning crystal blue pools back droppped by desert mountains and bright blue skys. I took a bunch of pictures, but I doubt it will do it justice. And they were far enough off the main road, and I was the only one there. It was one of those moments where i really couldn´t believe my surroundings. The energy was so tranquil yet vivid. I stayed a while to really take it in, but eventually I decided I should keep moving.

So I followed the road another 2 kilometers or so and along the way saw this big cactus garden, and a museum devoted to fossils from the area. Turns out where I am now used to be a sea a couple million years ago, so they have uncovered many an ancient sea creature. There´s one they found and litereally built a museum around it, never moving it from its discovery spot.

The walk itself was great. And it was one of those great weather days where the sky was just the best and brightest blue. All in all I ended up walking around 10km and my feet were definitely tired. On my return to town there was a huge storm cloud that followed me all the way home. It was pretty neat to see the rain falling far away. I was lucky that the rain reached Villa De Leyva half an hour after I was back in my room.

I spent the rest of the afternoon napping and reading my book. Now I´m here, and once I finish this I am off to find myself a good dinner. Oh, one more highlight from today, I managed to buy, hands down, the best strawberries i´ve ever had.

So, good day all around. I still have yet to decide what to do tomorrow. I guess we will just have to see.

Flying solo

2009-05-03T19:00:00.000-07:00

At 7am tomorrow morning I will be leaving for Villa De Leyva and I'll be there for a whole week! There are no words to describe how excited I am. This is the first big trip I'm taking solo, and it's to a town that I haven't stopped hearing about since I got here. I can't wait to see what this week holds.

This past week has been good, pretty mellow. I went to a dance festival on Wednesday down in the Candelaria and I read a ton. Today I had a very big eating day with good friends.

I'm gonna make this a short one, because I want to get plenty of rest. Many stories coming soon :)

wowwy wowwy ouchy ouchy

2009-04-26T20:07:00.000-07:00

An update two days in a row? Huh?

I just had to take a minute a write a little something about this past day. That hike was no joke. When I said my physical limits were going to be tested, well, they were. I have no idea what my body will feel like tomorrow, thank god for yoga, at least I know I'll stretch out tomorrow. I'll get a new round of pictures posted very soon so you can get a visual, right now I'm not moving.

Let's start at the beginning. It was a beautiful two and a half hour bus ride to San Bernardo. From there we followed a dirt road out of town. That almost immediately begin to go up hill. I was warned the first part was going to be the hardest, but damn, i was not even close to having an idea. The hike was 16 kilometers long, the first 4 of which were almost nearly straight up mountain. The was a rock path, that I was told is super old, pre-hispanic. It's the path the natives made and followed for who knows how long. Uphill has always been my weak point so it took me a bit longer. The main guild was super cool about it, he stayed with me and even carried my bag the second half of the way up the first climb.

Upon finally reaching the top of the mountain we nearly immediately started going down hill. And not just down hill, but down those same rocks, only now, it was interspersed with big pits of mud. Rocks and mud, rocks and mud, big stretch of just mud, then long stretch where the earth was firm... all downhill. This part did have the decency to even out occationally. There were times were we were on a very narrow path with stunning views on both sides.

When we finally reached the bottom of an impressively steep mud incline it openned up to two farms. The one on the right grew raspberries, and the one of the left sold these amazing exotic fruit called Granadilla. It most reminds me of a pomegranate, but the flavor and color are totally different. They were so amazing I bought 8, for the bargain price of about sixty cents.

Then down down down, straight up a stony road for one more kilometer, and then down down some more into a different town, whose name i forget, and then straight up a huuuge hill into the town square. The whole thing took 6 hours. And while very dirty I felt really great. I managed to not even hurt myself, or get eaten alive by bugs. The worst wound inflicted was a shoe burn on the back of my heel. I did it. I didn't die. It's definitely the hardest I've pushed myself in my memory.

I also really liked the people. Everyone was really nice, and it seemed like everyone was taking care of each other. With the brush burn on my ankle, they collaborated on the best way to cover it so it wouldn't torture me. And with a girl that sprained her wrist pretty badly, they took just as attentive care of her. And I talked to people. And did quite well, and understood much.

Will I be running to do another hike soon? Perhaps not one quite like that, but certainly something a bit easier. It's already close to 11, and I've been up since 5:30 this morning, and yet the adrenalin of the day is still pumping. The views from today were so breath taking, I would have like to take more pictures, but I was too busy trying not to die, and keeping up with the group.

The day ended with the most stunning sunset I've seen in quite some time. We got to watch it as we started our ride home. What made it really neat was that we saw it from many different perspectives. And the mountains and sky were both exceptionally beautiful. The colors were so freaking beautiful. Sadly, because I was on the bus, no pictures of that part.

Okay, I'm starting to wind down, but I'm glad I got this out. It's not often I get to write, right after something has happened. Today was one more day that leaves me stocked and amazed by my current living situation. I've never felt more alive. I guess the trick is to take these experiences and let them help me with wherever my life goes from here.

ok. bed.

Action

2009-04-25T16:48:00.000-07:00

It's been over a week, and I'm happy to report that my days have been filled with stuff. Some of the events from the past week include yoga, painting, reading about 150 pages in my book, jazz concert, lunch party, actions improv, dancing til three in the morning, going to the top of Monsorate to see an excellent view of the city, going to hot springs, and tomorrow, a 5 hour hike through the mountains in the southern part of the state.

Now you understand why I haven't been writing more. Much too busy having fun. The novelty of this trip just doesn't seem to wear off. And I've managed to keep myself so occupied, it makes me very grateful to not be limited by a job.

Today was the actions improv thing. It was with the group I had mentioned a few posts back, it ended up being a really great time. Essentially it was a very large game of follow the leader. Only we had umbrellas, and there was a whistle, and every time the whistle blew you had to freeze in a position of your choosing, using the umbrella in some way. We started at the national park and then went walking through a good deal of that part of town. We took one break, but we kept at it for a solid two and a half hours. We also had three people taping the whole thing, I look forward to seeing what the footage looks like. It was such a cool way to explore space and body, and also a fun way to see a part of the city that I was unfamiliar with until now.

I'd love to write more about all the other things I've been doing, but if i did you'd be in for a very long post. This blog is great because I can give a taste of what's been going on, but it doesn't even come close to including all my thoughts and effects this trip is having. Sometimes while I'm in the middle of a trip or whatever I find myself narrating in my head what I want to write here, but sadly most of it never makes it. There's just too much, and in the best of ways.

Tomorrow is going to be a serious test of my physical limits. I'm going on a trip with a walking group a friend told me about. It's up and through a big moutain a couple hours from the city, and it's 5-7 hours long. I think I'm up for it, though i have no doubt it'll kick my butt. Which is exactly what I want, so yay.

These past few weeks I've become more active than I've been in years, many years. I think the yoga three times a week is a big contributor. I'm finally at a point where my body craves activity daily; even if it's not hard, it has to do something. Today was a great way to exercise every part of myself. It required stamina, creativity, spacial awareness, and rhythm.

My parents have bought their plane tickets to visit. They'll be here in less than two months. I look forward to their coming, and know we will take many great trips together. But it also makes me more aware of how prescious these next two months are to me. This is the most free and independent I'm ever likely to be. I'm doing my best to stretch myself far and experience much. I think my next big trip is going to be solo and a couple days long. There's a town I keep hearing about, Villa De Leyva, it's calling my name.

I looking forward to telling you all about it. Next time.

Super free

2009-04-16T09:45:00.000-07:00

Starting Sunday I go from being close to totally free, to super free. I will be finishing up my online course which means I'll be released from the one and only real responsibility I've had since I've been here. It's been pretty amazing having all this unstructured time. I am not even sure how I've managed, but I still have yet to get bored. Filling up the hours of the day is remarkably easy.

From Thursday through Sunday I was in a small town called Villeta. Last week was Semana Santa, a week when basically the whole country goes on vacation. It was a chance to get to know some relatives a bit better, to meet new friends, to enjoy books and swimming pools, and do just a bit more exploring. I did quite a bit of walking all over the place, but certainly the highlight of the trip was following some railroad tracks through the countryside for a good two miles or so until I reached a waterfall quite popular with the locals. I managed to walk along the river and find an excellent stone just out of sight from everyone and just on the water where I could dangle my legs in and take in the scene. I stayed there for a solid hour and a half, just sitting, thinking, living.

This is my life now. And I am damn lucky for it. It's interesting when I tell other people about all the walking and exploring I do. Like with my trip from Tabio to Chia, every time I tell people they ask who I went with and every time I say I went alone I watch as people's eyes pop out of their heads. It's apparently something that just isn't done here. And I understand, yes, this is Colombia, and yes, there's always the chance of getting robbed, and it's not like I'm going to start planning trips into the jungle by myself or anything, but perhaps, just perhaps, I don't need to be quite so afriad. I discovered how much I enjoy traveling on my own. While company is always great, my thoughts are pretty good company all by themselves. And those thoughts all tell me I want to do more. So dad, since I know you are reading this, you offically have homework, I want you to send me an e-mail with four or five places it's safe for me to go alone. Places with hot springs or horseback riding are a big plus!

Alone is what I am right now. It's what I've got to work with. And not in a sad way, it just is what it is. While I do know a couple people here, and I am living with my grandparents, and I'm meeting more people as time goes on, the fact still remains that I am the only person I am close to right now. And it's good for me, to have this time. I think learning how to make yourself happy, and keep yourself busy are really valuable life lessons.

To celebrate my freedom from everything I bought myself a new book. I have just started "David Copperfield" by Charles Dickens. It's 700 pages and it's about one man's journey. It's one of those books that get referenced all the freaking time, and it's come up in so many of my books recently, I decided I was due. I've been interested in classics a lot more recently. Once you start reading them, you realize they are classics for a reason.

So, today, I read. Tomorrow, who knows. :)

The road from Tabio

2009-04-07T20:27:00.000-07:00

I don't know how long I'm going to make this one, but I've been meaning to update for ages so I figure I'm finally due. It's 10:30pm right now and I'm dead tired. Why? you ask... well I spent over 6 hours walking today. I stopped for breaks, otherwise I'd be really dead, but climbing up and down a mountain and through two towns can really take it out of a girl.

Today I took a bus to Tabio, my 'hometown.' My parents built a house there back in the 70's and I did live there back when I was just a tot. It's about 45 minutes from Bogota, but a world away. I posted a bunch of new pictures on my facebook, take a look when you have the chance. I do need to revamp this site big time, but at least there is some good photos somewhere, so that counts for something.

I really put my sense of direction to the test today. I used no map, just followed my feet. Those feet took me all the way through Tabio, past the house my parents built, down many a dirt road, up, around, and down a mountain to a town called Chia. There were very few people along the way, just a few cars and motorcycles. I found a really excellent resting point between the two towns and sat and enjoyed my life for a good hour and a half.

Since last I updated I went to yoga three times, started a painting, and made a few new friends. I also went on some killer walks and spent some quality time with my grandparents. I'm also working on my final paper for my African American literature course. It's hard to believe that within a week or two I'll be rid of the one real responsibility I've had since being here.

Annnnnd I got accepted into the Encuentro project that I applied for back in February!!!! To participate, not present. Which actually I think will work out better. The last 9 days of August I will be interacting, watching, and learning from so many great minds in countless workshops, performances and lectures all based around the idea of "staging citizenship."

I fell like this trip keeps offering me these small (and not so small) gifts all along my way. I'm officially past the three month mark. I'm no closer to being commited to a path, but the possibilities keep swelling. Today was such a good warm up for me. It gave me a chance to understand how far I've come and how comfortable I am with asking directions and finding my own way. It makes taking bigger risks and challeneges not only easier, but inevitable.

social networks

2009-03-26T23:10:00.000-07:00

Today was a good day. Very good. And when it comes down to it, nearly every day has been good. Today I spent some time at the national university. I have recently met this girl, through my friend, who is a Spanish professor. She's very eager to learn English so we have made a deal. We are going to meet for two hour sessions, twice a week, and she's going to help me with spanish and I will help her with english. Today was our first session, and I think it will be good for both of us.

After meeting her I had dinner with this woman and her family who knew my parents over 35 years ago. She housed my mother while she was a student here back in the 70's. They were so kind and warm, and made it very clear that I should consider them family now, and that I was welcome in their home any time. They talked of trips they could take me on, and things to do in Bogota. And there are 4 of them who are interested in learning english, so I could have as many as four students in the future.

And this past Tuesday I went to a meeting for this performance/action group that is beginning to form, and it just might be something. They want to do stuff along the lines of the group 'Improv Everywhere,' which if you've never heard of, it's worth looking up. The idea is doing actions in public, with large groups of people, and filming it, documenting it, seeing how the people react. my love of public art runs deep, so the opportunity to get involved with other artists doing public experiements couldn't be more suited for me. I'm very exicted to see what comes of it. I'll be sure to give more information when I myself know more.

I also learned of a free yoga class that takes place at La National three times a week. (!!!) I've been dying to get back to yoga, it's something my body has really missed since being here. And the fact that it's free, how awesome is that? Saturday I also have plans with someone else that my same friend introduced me to. All I know is that it's some sort of theater event, and that there are two other people she wants to introduce me to.

I am really starting to get a handle on this place in a significant way. In a way that I know will only increase in the months to come. As it is, I now have plans for the rest of the weekend and into next week. And something tells me, by the end of next week, I'll have even more. I started here with no friends, and was lucky to make one nearly right away. And that one friend has directly or indirectly introduced me to several others, as well as many great opportunities. It's amazing what meeting the right people will do.

This adventures evolves with each day. Just as I too am evolving. I realized today that my spanish really is improving. I'm understanding close to everything these days. The fact that I could sit and talk with a family I'd never met before, and have little trouble understanding or participating, is pretty darn cool if you ask me.

Well, it's late, I should sleep. I'm glad I held out long enough to update though. I can't wait to see what I have to write about next time :).

foundation

2009-03-19T16:19:00.000-07:00

The weekend in the country was really wonderful. The house I stayed in was beautiful and completely isolated from everything. The feeling of being surrounded by mountains and nothing else, with only them, fruit trees, and flowers to feast my eyes upon... it's hard to articulate. And the family friends that I was staying with were so kind to me, and got me talking, which I need. They took me to a mountain they own (how crazy it is to own a mountain?), and told me about all the plans they had for it. And on Saturday night there was a huge thunderstorm and all the power went out. I loooove blackouts, there's something so peaceful about them. That night I laid in a hammock and listened to the rain and watched the lighting over the mountains until after one in the morning. It was a chance for my mind to swim freely. And while I had many thoughts that night the one that recurred again and again is that I am where I am supposed to be, and that my task is to make the best of situations presented to me.

When I got home on sunday night I was contacted by someone I met in the performance workshop a few weeks back. He invited me to visit some art classes that he teaches, so that was how I spent my monday. It was a really good time, and it made me want to buy paint. It's a medium I've never really worked with before, but I think that I could really enjoy it. He also invited me to some sort of artist action group that is meeting this Tuesday. I'm very excited to see what that's all about. The thing that has most bummed me out since being here is my lack of social network and having so few friends to pass the time with. I'm beginning to feel like that part of the journey is starting to open up. I am quite grateful for that.

I'm also learning how to knit. So far I'm still terrible at it, but with more practice I'll start getting the hang of it. My abuelita is teaching me, which is cool. While we've started talking more, there's still an obvious language gap between us, so it's nice for us to have something to do together. Plus knitting is something I've always wanted to learn and just never got around to it.

I've been thinking a lot about using this trip to learn skills. I've been talking about painting and knitting in this entry, but I want to learn other things too. Like how to sew (which is something I learned long ago and would love to pick up again), and how to cook authentic dishes, and teach english. It's such an amazing thing to not have to focus on the making of money. It's something that can consume people so fully, and for now I have been given the gift of being free of it. For now my job is to learn how to be awesome at life, in as many ways as I can. I take it seriously, but also is has allowed me to release and relax in such a profound way.

I still get into bad moods, but the fact that I have no reason to be in them, and I know that, makes them easier to work through and let go of. Walking has been my saving grace. I'm convinced it solves everything. I'm learning the moods will come and go and there is no need to let them control me.

Learning how to be happy and to take everything in stride is surprisingly hard work sometimes, but I can think of no better or productive use of my time.

Going with the flow

2009-03-11T10:19:00.000-07:00

So it looks like I'm updating closer to once a week than twice. Which is okay. My life right now isn't super action packed, and you don't need to know about everything, but I'm happy to continue to check in. Checking in is important.

So since I've last updated nothing major has happened. The best night I've had was this past Friday. My friends had me and my grandparents over for dinner, and I was the one who got to make it. Most people know, my specialty is pizza made from scratch. I love making it and it always comes out great. So Friday night I got a chance to make it for my closest friends and family here, and it also gave them a chance to meet. The food was delicious, and they all got along incredibly well. Dinner didn't end until after midnight. it was one of those nights that made me feel all warm and fuzzy.

Other than that I've just been continuing to sleep, walk, write, draw and read in abundance. Right now I have 30 pages left in "Age of Innoncence" by Edith Wharton, it's so beautiful. I've been trying to read it as slowly as possible because I don't want it to end. For about a day I thought that I was going to go to a Santana concert that's happening here tomorrow. I was really excited about it, but it turns out it's all sold out. It was a bummer because, that, I am quite certain, would have been an incredibly fun and authentic Colombian evening. Plus any chance I get to dance my butt off is a good time in my book.

As it turns out, my plans for weeks end are pretty great anyway. I'm finally going to get the chance to go to my dad's friend's country house out in the hot mountains. I have several days of swimming and chilling in hammocks to look forward to.

Being here is teaching me a lot about just taking the days as they come, enjoying the hell out of them, and not worrying if they don't work out as planned.... cause they almost never do. It's all about continuing to put one foot in front of the other. Slow and steady. I think often times in life it's difficult to recognize when you are making progress, but all I need to do is look back to where I started to realize I've already grown a lot by being here. I'm sure the months to come will make it all the more evident.

planning

2009-03-02T17:42:00.000-08:00

So it's been a week since I've written. The longer the gap in between the harder it is to get back to. Mainly because it becomes a question of where to begin. This past week has been a good one. I had something to do every day of the week and got to meet some new people in the process. Let's start with the workshop that I did...

The workshop was with an artist named Martin Monlinaro. He is Argentinian and has been traveling all over the world doing art exhibitions and workshops. His stuff combines performance with photography, and the result is quite interesting. My only regret is that I didn't take a single photo through the four days. It was an interesting group of people, many of whom I hope to reconnect with. The workshop focused a lot on space and how we interact with it. We spent a whole day working with stools and playing with all the different ways of interacting with them. We also did some exercises that involved writing some stuff, then exchanging it with someone else and then figuring out how to interpret what you've been given.

The class got my brian working and I'm really happy that I got the opportunity. I can already feel the things I've learned working their way through me. Since I've been here I've started getting into the habit of taking long walks. Not with any direction, just letting my feet take the lead. And recently these walks have turned equally as much into dance sessions. There are tons of parks all over the place and they make such excellent dance floors they are impossible to resist. Now that I've taken this workshop I realize how much these walks become about exploring the space I'm in, and how to interact with it. Today I used basketball courts, trees, slides, swings... they were all my own private dance floor and I loved every minute of it. I think that once I get a better idea of where this hobby of mine is going, it'll be great to get someone to video tape some of the work I'm doing.

I occationally get some funny looks, some stares, and the one day I even had four teenagers come up and start asking me questions about what kind of dance I was doing. They seemed to be really confused by the concept of dancing for the hell of it, with no name, no order... just dance. I am curious to see what other kind of questions and what other people I will meet in this way. All I know is that it's a really fun way to kill a few hours.

I met a girl in the workshop who has connected me with a girl who is a really great dancer and it has resulted in an invitation to check out a dance class with her. I was supposed to go today, but due to mis-connection it will not be until Thursday. I look forward to getting into a formal class. I think the first few will kick my butt, but I'll get the hang of it. I really want to push my body further. And I got a call today to go for an interview tomorrow for an English teaching job. We'll see how that pans out. I also have a an opportunity to visit a friend of my father's out in the country. It would be a couple days in a nice hot place surrounded by mountains and fruit trees, getting to hang out in a pool and hammocks. I can't wait :).

This country has so much to offer. Invitations are popping up here and there and I'm really starting to get comfortable. Tomorrow will be my two month mark. In that time I've made some friends, taken a workshop, and applied for a big art conference in August... and those are just the big things. It can be a bit surreal having all this time on my hands and really being the master of my own day; it's pretty weird having no serious anchor, or real responsibility. It can make me feel restless at times, make me feel like I'm floating, but one thing I can say for sure: even my worst day here has been great.

I don't think I'll ever stop being greatful for this opportunity.

Workshop

2009-02-23T17:53:00.000-08:00

So I am very happy to report my proposal is all done and submitted. YAY!!! Now I just have to wait an uncertain number of months to hear something. I'm pretty happy with what I wrote, and when I'm feeling a little less lazy I plan on adding the material to this blog. Soon soon, I swear.

Today I had the privilege of attending a performance art workshop at the National University. It's three days, and today I think was more of a warm up day. During the 3 and a half hours of the workshop, a solid two were taken up by talking. In Spanish I might add. I got about 60 percent of it, which is pretty good. There were many different accents and people talked fast so I'm pretty happy I got that much. I have been assured that tomorrow will be more about doing than talking, so that's exciting.

The thing I liked most about today was just being on campus. The Encuentro program that I just applied for is being run through the National, so when I stepped on campus and discovered it was positively covered in graffiti, I decided to take it as a good sign of things to come. Tomorrow I'm going to go early and take lots of pictures.

I'll write more after the workshop is over. I'm excited to see what the next two days hold :).

Birthdays

2009-02-21T18:25:00.000-08:00

It seems like these past few weeks have been positively packed with Birthdays. My abuelita's was yesterday, my mother's is tomorrow, and today I went to the birthday for someone who was turning 94 today. I'm pretty sure there's been at least one birthday a week since i got here. And birthdays come with cake so I've been feed well lately. Today the menu consisted of meat, meat, and more meat. Oh, and some potatoes and guacamole. It was pretty good, my belly feels full. Tomorrow me and my grandparents are going to Sylvania. I don't know anything about it except that its warm. Yay! for summer dresses.

I've been really active and productive this week, I'm pretty proud of myself. I've been writing a proposal for this thing that's happening here in August. It's called Encuentro, take a look. Does this not look absolutely perfect for me? I really had no expectation of finding something so suited for me within the first month of moving here. Since I want this badly I've been writing and re-writing for two weeks now. I think I'm almost cross the finish line. One more round of editing and it should be ready for submission. I've been so dedicated to working on the proposal, I managed to bang out my midterm for my online class a whole three days early so I wouldn't need to stress about it. That's something that simply would not have happened a year ago. I used to be the queen of procrastination. But I've realized that procrastinating really stresses me out so I've slowly gotten better at not doing it.

Tonight I'm actually going out. I can't wait.

I'm here

2009-02-16T14:34:00.000-08:00

I haven't really been updating much because right now there isn't much to report. I am hoping that will change soon. I am currently in the process of applying for this artist/activist thing that is happening Bogota in August. It looks like it could be a really great opportunity, and totally perfect for my interests. I also am trying to make some contacts in the art world down here, so we'll see how it all plays out.

It's starting to really sink in that this is my home now. The newness of my situation is wearing off, and what I'm left with is this realization that things are just beginning. I'm still unemployed at the moment, and it has been really great, but I'm beginning to feel like it's finally time to start looking out for some work. I've realized that teaching English isn't really my aim, I'm looking more into teaching theater in English. It's important to me to stay in the arts field, it's what gives me life and makes me happy, so it's important to stay with it.

I finally got some pictures posted on my facebook, though photobucket is still giving me trouble. I'm just happy I can finally share what my eyes have been feasting on ever since I got here.

I wish I had more to write, but really I'll just be filling space. I'll write more when I have something to say. Which I imagine will be pretty soon. But for now, I am off.

25 things

2009-02-11T09:55:00.000-08:00

So this thing has been floating around facebook for a while and I've been tagged a couple of times now so I figure I'm due.

1. I like who I am. I try hard not to fixate on the stupid things I say and do from time to time (because we all say and do stupid things here and there), and try not to care too much about the people who seem to think my confidence in a character flaw.

2. I really like people and am most happy when I can share my life with others.

3. Kinda going with that, Family and Community are very important to me. Life is all about who you spend your time with, I just prefer to spend mine with other caring people who want to lift eachother up, teach and learn from each other, and who know how to enjoy life for all that it is worth.

4. I like to share. In turn, I like it when others share with me. If we are at a resturant, I'm going to want to try whatever you ordered. I hope you don't mind.

5. My number one pet peeve is flakey people. If you give me a time and a place, I will show up, and call if I will be late. Why oh why is this concept so difficult for so many others?

6. I am very forgiving and I rarely hold a grudge. Please don't take advantage.

7. This is the first time in my life where my days truly belong to me. It's an amazing thing to be able to wake up and ask myself "So what do I WANT to do today?" I do not take this privilage lightly, and will do all that I can to make this time in my life productive and just plain kick-ass.

8. I'm pretty fickle about freshness when it comes to food. I get pretty grossed out when things taste even a little old.

9. I have a pretty serious sugar addiction that I am trying to come to terms with. I battle with the fact that I love it and want it daily, but can imagine my teeth rotting away...

10. I LOVE to read. But I am the slowest reader of anyone I know.

11. I think I have a phobia of being famous. The idea of people following me around with cameras ready to criticize me at any opportunity is my idea of hell.

12. I'm the opposite of a competative person. Even in card games and stuff, when it comes down to it, I really don't care if I win, as long as I enjoy the game and the people I'm playing with.

13. I have had a pretty unorthadox education. I only went to school sporadically growing up, I've gone to three different universities, lived in in New York for three years, and now while I am in Colombia I am working at finishing my degree online. And that's only because you need a degree to get paid like a person. I've always found life the best teacher.

14. That being said I really long for a mentor. I learn best from people, I would love the opportunity to work closely with someone deep in the arts/activist field who could really spend time teaching me how to get to most out of me.

15. I have no idea where my life will lead me. And it makes me happy.

16. It is important to be honest with myself and others. Really, what good does it do to lie? I saw Revolutionary Road recently and there was a quote from it that has stuck to me "Everyone knows what the truth is, they just get better at lying." I feel like we'd all be better off if we didn't depend on illusions so much.

17. I try really hard not to judge others, even when, especially when, I don't agree with them. We all have our reasons for doing what we do, I just hope you know what yours are.

18. I have zero tolerance for shitty negative people. We all have our ups and downs, but that's no excuse to make my life suck.

19. I like being helpful, and I will continue to search for the best way of contributing my time for as long as I live. That's not me being autuistic, that's me doing what makes me happy.

20. I believe in the power of art to create positive change in the world. Art was my savior growing up, and I don't think you need to go into it as a profession for it to be important to your life. We all have an artist inside of us, because all of us are works of art.

21. I'm an independent person, always have been. I have always done things my own way, and I HATE being told what to do.

22. While I am fiercely independent, and do want to spend the next 5 to 10 years traveling, I admit that I long to have a family and a place to call home.

23. I have genuine interest in reconnecting with the people from my past. It doesn't matter how long it's been, or how we left things the last time we saw each other. Chances are, hearing from you will make me happy, so never be afraid to contact me.

24. This whole facebook/blogger/online community thing still feels strange to me. In some ways I really like it because I more connected with people than I ever was growing up, but still... I don't know if I will ever get over wondering if what intend on putting out there is what other people are taking in. But I suppose that's true regardless of the medium used.

25. I admit that I think about myself a lot, constantly assessing where I am, where I'm going, what I want, and who I will become. I do not believe this makes me self-centered, just self-aware.

Signs

2009-02-09T10:43:00.001-08:00

Yesterday was one of the first times I've woken up grumpy in a while. It was one of those days where my body hurt, I didn't feel like doing anything, and I felt like I was wasting the day away. Luckily I decided to be pro-active and do stuff anyway.

I decided to go for a walk. I really like setting off with no real direction and seeing where my feet take me. Yesterday they took me exactly where I needed to go. In my ever-growing collection of Colombian graffiti, yesterday I found one that felt like a sign to me. I'm big on signs. Things that remind me that I'm on the right track. The first mural I saw yesterday was of a person tumbling in flowers. It was three pictures, one with the girl standing, second one she's upside down, and the third is a girl standing on a crescent moon. Anyone who knows me at all, can understand why this one made me happy. And what made it even cooler was that it was surrounded by tons of flowers and trees and happy greenness.

I continued walking and happened upon a drainage canal that was covered in graffiti that has been weathered. I walked along to canal for a while, taking pictures and looking around, and then when there was a natural place for me to get back to street level, before I knew it I happened upon, what I think will become, my favorite park. It's not very big, about the size of a substantial empty lot, but all it had in it was trees and grass. I almost walked past, but I knew I was meant to stop. I spent the next hour dancing and stretching and meditating, and admiring the green. The one thing that Bogota has up on new york in spades is the trees. SO many trees.

The walk centered me, reminded me that not only am I supposed to be here, but that I want to be here, and that as long as I continue to pay attention to the things I want and need, the city will continue to provide.

I spent the rest of the day with my grandmother. She took me to visit her brother and then to this beautiful old mall nearby. We kept walking and found ourselves in a square packed full of magicians, jugglers, acrobats, living statues and muscians. And tons of people enjoying the setting. There's so much life here, and people here really seem to know how to make the most of it.

I'm getting into my second month now and everything is starting to feel managable and promising. My spanish is really starting to improve. Today I spent some time showing my grandmother photos on my computer, and I was able to tell her small stories about many of the photographs. It's getting easier.

I also have a student now. He's going to be here in an hour. The friend I have made here gave him to me. It's two hours a week, but it's a start. And other prospects are starting to appear here and there, I'll say more if any of it pans out.

The only thing that makes me sad is that I've been having so much trouble posting my pictures. Technology has never been my strong point, but I refuse to be defeated. I will be able to share my pictures soon. I'm just gonna keep working at it until I finally figure out what the problem is.

For now, I must prepare for my lesson.

Work

2009-02-02T17:32:00.000-08:00

So right now my computer is offically sick, so all hope I had of getting all my photos uploaded has been delayed once more. That makes me sad. Now I have to figure out where to go and who to talk to to make my computer happy again. Hopefully I'll get to the bottom of it by weeks end.

Yesterday I had my first out of Bogota adventure, and I have to say, it was really wonderful. I went to a place called Guatavita, which is a lagoon that was formed when a meteor crashed into the moutain about 2000 years ago. Guatavita is at the center of the myth of El Dorado. It was a ritual site where people would be babtized by rubbing gold powder all over their bodies and then dive into the water. The idea was that by doing this the person would obtain special powers. The lagoon was drained several times over the passed 500 years by fortune hunters who thought the bottom must be filled with gold, though very little was ever recovered.

It's a beautiful spot, but getting their is not for the faint of heart. From where the bus left us off, it is a 7 km hike uphill to the entrance of the park. From there it is another one or two kilometer hike up these super steep slanty stone steps. Then it's another 7km straight downhill to make it back to the main road. It was freaking hard work, but the views throughout the trip made it quite rewarding. I got some great photos and got to spend the day with my new friends. By the time I got home I was so exhausted, I was fast asleep by 10pm.

It was so nice to get out in the country. The views are breathtaking and the air feels so great. There really is nothing like good clean air. And since the trip was so trying, it forced me to breathe in a ton of it. Along the way my friends point out all the different kinds of crops we were seeing. I learned that pea plants look like a sea of purple from far away. And we also saw lots and lots of cows, at every stage of life.

So now it is Monday again, and I have to decide how to make this week a productive one. I'm realizing that it's not important to me that I haven't found a job yet. I'm pretty good at not spending much money, and I seem to be awesome at filling my days. Today I wrote a paper, took a long walk, and have read about 45 pages worth of text on the reconstruction period of African American Literature. And I updated my blog. Not too shaby for a day's work.

Tomorrow I'm gonna go explore the streets of Bogota. There's a huge stretch of graffiti that I've passed a couple of times now while on the bus. I plan to start there and see where my feet take me.

Keeping Busy

2009-01-29T15:31:00.000-08:00

So I'm updating, but I think it's going to be a short one because there isn't much to report.

I've spent this week emersed in literature, of the both fun and not fun variaty. I devoured a booked called "Veronica" by Nicholas Christopher in less than three days, and then the past few days I've been reading the auto-biographies of Fredrick Douglass and others for my African american lit course. Veronica was really good, I think it would make an amazing animated feature if done right; the auto-biographies... well... they just made me sad. There's no better way of putting it. Reading about the oppression that was allowed to exist in the states for so long, it's just heartbreaking to me that people could be so cruel to each other. It's not even something I want to write about here because it upsets me, and I might as well save it for when I have to respond for my class.

I am beginning to look for work. I thought I had a good lead yesterday, but the guy never called me back. It was for someone asking for 20 hours a week to look after their son and speak to him only in english. I was hoping to get it because I think it could be a good way to learn and start out, but whatever, there'll be more opportunites. I have an interview tomorrow for some sort of teaching job. I guess I'll know more tomorrow.

I have to say that while i don't have a job, and I'm still relatively new here, I have been managing to keep quite busy. I'm getting to be social and also spend plenty of time with myself. I have yet to really feel bored. So little is being demanded of me at the moment, but I am reading, writing, and drawing daily. And for a good many hours a day. This week has felt quite full with it. Tomorrow I have to write a 500 word paper. I could do it now I guess, but I think I've had enough of thinking about the horrors of slavery for one day.

I am hoping to get out of the city this weekend. It would be nice to go somewhere a bit more remote and with yummy clean air. We'll see how it goes.

Three weeks in...

2009-01-25T11:00:00.000-08:00

I have to say, I'm really happy. It sneaks up on me and surprises me from time to time. Put the thought never fails to enter my head at least a couple times a day, I am really happy. And I'm happy because I like the choices I have made, and where they have brought me.

Things here are good. I've been having a really great weekend. I offically made a new friend. She's a girl I met at the shady training session I was doing. It's nice to know that week wasn't a COMPLETE waste of time. I think I can sum up my whole time training there in two lines of diologue from Tuesday's training session with the other girls...

"Instructor": Do you know what put out means?
Me: Do you know what put out means?

So yeah, I'm done with that place, now it is a matter of finding a different job. I'll start the search tomorrow. I have the very nice advantage of not needing the money right now so that means I can hold out for something I will really enjoy. Job searching is one of my least favorite things ever, but the fact that it isn't urgent makes the whole thing a lot easier to handle.

So my weekend... on Friday I met up with my new friend for coffee and dancing. It was such a blast. She is really great, and I look forward to spending more time with her. We went to this tiny whole in the wall that I would have never noticed had she not taken me too. It was a salsa place, the music was great, and everyone there could dance. And well too. She invited her husband and two of her friends, one of whom is a dance instructor, so I got to learn bunches. At the beginning of the night they were totally wiping the floor with me, but by the end of the night I think I was holding my own. Just a really great time.

And last night was the wedding. Let it be known, my grandparents know how to party. The wedding was in a cafe that was covered in american movie and music paraphanalia from the 60's and 70's, it was a crowd of maybe 75-100, there was tons of excellent live music, good food, free flowing alcohol, and dancing dancing dancing. The night started at 6pm, and we didn't leave until after 2:30am. My grandparents were dancing practically the whole time. Pretty impressive. I held my own too. I also got to meet some new people, and see some of the ones I've met already. My feet and head were hurting a bit this morning, but it was totally worth it, I had a great time.

Today I do nothing. That is my plan. Well, I'll start a new book, that's enough excitement for me. I think this next week will be a pretty busy one, and I have to definitely put some work in, but I look forward to it. This trip is good because it is teaching me a lot about discipline. Since I'm the only one managing my time, I have no one to blame for my wasting the day away but me. It gives me incentive to stay on top of things.

Quite a few of the friends I have made so far speak english quite well. Which is both good and bad. Great because I get to have real conversations easily, bad because it makes it easier to not practice my spanish. I've been thinking about finding a spanish course here. I think I'm going to learn a lot just by being here, but it is important to me to learn spanish properly. I think taking a class would definitely help the grammer come faster.

We will see. All in good time. For now, I'm gonna go start a new book.

Change is coming

2009-01-20T16:03:00.000-08:00

So we have a new president. It has finally happened. I couldn't be more thrilled. I got to watch the whole thing today, and swelled with pride and excitement and joy for what is to come.

Things are changing, and in a big way. Being here definitely highlights that point for me right now. I'm changing, I can feel it. My spanish is getting better by the day, and only two weeks in, this is starting to feel like home. My grandparents' have been so good to me, and I have more freedom than I've ever had in my life. This time is just for me, and I get to decide how it is spent.

While there is plenty to get used to and to learn, I think the initial shock of being here has worn off. Now I get to focus on what comes next. I already know that I am not going to continue to train at the academy that I've been going to for the past week. I don't want to say anything too mean or anything, but suffice it to say that he is wasting my time, is not at all trustworthy, and I refuse to let him make money off of me But there are plenty of schools in Bogota, I have no doubt the right job is out there right now just waiting for me.

My training session today did have the upside of introducing me to two women who are native to Bogota, both of which seem very interesting and friendly. One of the big obsticles to overcome in a new place is making friends, and I am hoping that I have found some. I also have a couple of social engagements to look forward to this week. The biggest being an authentic Colombian wedding. I can't wait to get to meet more of my family and people and get all decked out and dance the night away.

I never did get to go to the mountains, due to rain and hangovers (not mine). But I have no doubt I'll get to climb one soon enough. Right now I am looking forward and I like what I see. I have the opportunity to learn so much in the months to come. So far the learning has mostly taken the form of getting to know my family better, and that, I think, is a very good place to start.

One of these days I'm going to spend some time spiffing up the site and adding photos. I also have quite a few drawings that have been pouring out of me recently. This is an exciting time, it's moving fast, it has been giving me great joy to ride along with it.

Two week mark

2009-01-17T10:12:00.000-08:00

So I have offically been here for two weeks now, and I have to say, things are starting to feel more managable. There's plenty to learn and much work ahead, but I know that I'll find my groove. Once I get the WiFi working in my room I'll be a happy girl.

I passed the teaching test so I was able to continue with my training. While I know I have to put a lot of work into this whole teaching thing I have a feeling I can get good at it. I have one more week to train, and I'm going to get to observe some classes in this next week, that will help a lot.

Yesterday I went to a salsa class with a girl and her boyfriend that are starting to become friends. They plan on taking me out dancing with them soon with some of their other friends so I know that I have some social stuff to look forward to in the near future. Also my youngest cousin has been staying with me and my grandparents the past few days. it's nice to have her around, she's always in a good mood and she loves to play and be silly. I taught her how to play Rummy and also how to shuffle. Now she is on a card playing kick, which can be a nice way to pass the time. Tomorrow I'm going to climb a mountain with my cousins. It'll be so nice to get some fresh air, some activity, and some nature. The day will start early, I hope the weather is on our side.

It's been good just getting to know Bogota. The one big downside of this city, and one that I can foresee making me not want to live in it for any extended period of time is that the air quality here really is terrible. People talk about New York being bad, and I always understood there was a lot of stuff in the air, but I never found I could feel and smell it. Here, you really can. It is not uncommon to see people with face masks or scarfs covering their mouth and nose. It has to do with there being so many cars and being in the middle of the mountains so there is nowhere for the pollution to go. In New York, at least you have all the water to help clean the air. Also, this city is under construction. And in a different way than New York. Practically every block you go down you will see them putting up apartment buildings. They have been knocking down a lot of the houses to make more apartments. I guess they are preparing for Bogota to continue growing the way that it has been. It's so much a part of the environment here.

I'm just taking it all in, and trying to decide the best way to spend the next 6 and a half months of my life. I look forward to doing a lot of walking, and continuing to document all the graffiti and city life. Today is the first day I have had no plans and the apartment to myself, and I intend on taking full advantage by being a lazy bum and reading the day away.

More soon.

Full but happy

2009-01-13T18:13:00.000-08:00

Today i had my first training session for my teaching. He gave me a lot of stuff to look up and learn about, and I must admit, it is making my head feel quite full. But this is exactly why I moved here. It's important to me to stretch myself as far as I can go. Things feel a bit daunting, and right now it seems like it'll be an uphill battle to get good, but I know the is just the beginning. I have to have as much patience with myself as I have with others. One day at a time, it's the only way. Tomorrow I have to take some sort of "teaching test" and that will determine if I'm going to get to continue with the training. I wasn't given any real indication as to what will be on the test, but it apparently is not about grammer, but teaching methods. Cross your fingers for me.

Yesterday I ventured out alone for the first time since I've been here. Well, the first time I took public transportation at least. I went back to the Simon Bolivar park. I did a ton of walking, stopping every so often when I found a good people watching spot. I also found this very comfty natural grassy chair in the side of a hill by the lake, and I curled up in it and read for a long time. It put is in a really possitve and happy mood.

Every day I go between feeling like this is so great and I'm really happy to be here to feeling very overwhelmed and homesick. I think that's natural, especailly when I have as wonderful a home to miss as I do. Tomorrow I'm going to get to spend some time downtown in the oldest part of the city called The Candelaria, I'm really looking forward to that.

Little bit by little bit things are getting easier. I can't wait to get over the hump of the first month.

Time

2009-01-10T18:15:00.000-08:00

So I have offically been here a week. It seems so much longer and shorter at the same time. I can tell I've changed and learned through out this week, but it would be hard to describe how. My Spanish has improved to be sure, that is very reassuring.

Last night I went to a birthday party for the husband of my Abuelita'a niece. It was a group of about twenty or so and thankfully, a few of them were my age. The night started out pretty boring, but soon enough drinks were being served and good music was played and everyone sat around talking and storytelling. I was pretty silent at first but some of the people got me talking. I may have even made a friend who is going to invite me to take some dance classes with her; I'm excited to see how that pans out. The first hour or two I emersed myself in some beautiful books about Colombia, with lots of pictures and interesting information.

For those of you who don't know much about where I am right now, let me give you just a bit of information. I am living in Bogota, which is both the capital of the whole country and also the capital on the department it is in. The deparment (which is like a state in the US) is called Cundinamarca. It is the political, economical, and cultural center of the country. Bogota is on top of a mountain, nestled in a valley. It started out relatively small and then continued to spread; the book I read last night said that it is over 310 square kilometers, 2640 meters high, with a population of 8 million. Because it is so near to the equator, Colombia's climate is dependant completely on the altitude, and Bogota is the third highest major city in the world and maintains a spring like climate year round. The only difference in seasons is that during some months it rains a whole lot more. The weather is almost always somewhere between 45-75 degrees and it is based on whether or not the sun is out. The tempture can go up and down in a matter of minutes, so it's always good to dress in layers and bring an umbrella. Colombia itself has a great variety of nearly everything, including plant life, animals, and environments. It has huge mountains, low plains, jungles, and coasts on both the Atlantic and Pacific ocean. Besides the well know exports of coffee and drugs, it is also a very big exporter of flowers, food, and salt, to name a few.

I'm really happy that I'm getting to learn about this country. While being here can be scary and overwhelming at times, I can't get over the feeling that I'm doing something that will forever impact and change me. I've noticed that people (at least my grandparents and their friends) pay close attention to history. In the time that I've been here, I've learned a bit about where my family has come from and events from the past that have shaped thier view points. I imagine that will be a continual thing.

It's a really beautiful country and interesting city. I have been wanting to post some pictures that I have taken, but I have yet to get my laptop to connect to the internet long enough to make that happen. I have some awesome pictures of the city surrounded by mountains, the beautiful flowering trees and bushes that are everywhere, and the graffiti that covers a great deal of the walls of the city.

Today I went to the park de Bolivar (named after Simon Bolivar, one of south america's most famous revolutionaries), it is the biggest green space in the city, and is a great place to go walking. My Abuelita anf I took our time and did a circle around most of it. I look forward to returning there often.

So, here I am, a week in and I think I've made a very solid start. I am going to begin training for my teaching job on Tuesday, and I am still going to have plenty of time to do more exploring on my time off. I will continue to post every few days and I hope to have some photos up soon.

for now, I am signing off.

Not in the US

2009-01-08T19:09:00.000-08:00

You know you are not in the US anymore when your job interviewer says to you...

"It's okay that we won't be paying you very much, because you're a pretty girl so you'll find lots of guys to take you on dates and pay for everything."

true story.

Getting Used to it

2009-01-07T16:49:00.000-08:00

Today was a pretty good day. I woke up to a phone call from my prospective employer. For those of you who might not know, I plan on teaching English during my stay here in Colombia. I have never done this type of teaching before, but I have a feeling I will be good at it. I like to think communication skills are a strong point for me, and my 3 year stay in New York insured that my ability to be patient. Tomorrow I have the formal interview, I think it will go well.

Last night I found myself at a dinner party at my great uncle's place. It was me and 10 relatives who insisted on having 3 different conversations at a time in very rapid Spanish. I think I understood about 30% of the total conversation, but three days in, and with that much stimuli, I say, not bad megg, not bad. Today I went to a part of Bogota I've never been to, to visit my cousins for lunch and relaxation. Only 2 of the 4 cousins were there, my 11 year cousin Monica, and my 20 year old cousin Beatriz-Helena. They were very kind to me and invited me on a walk. It was a beautiful day and they actually got me talking, which was nice. Sometimes it would take two or three tries, but we kept at it and managed to understand a good 90% of what the other was saying.

I'm also getting used to the altitude which helps. Yesterday I felt like I got hit by a bus. Today is much better. I have no doubt that tomorrow will be better still. My major complaint for the moment has to do with food. While everyone here has been great about feeding me often, and been understanding that I never eat much at one sitting, the food itself is quite bland and consists mainly of meat and starch. Learning where to find exciting food has made it on my list of priorities.

In addition to all the work I will be putting in here, I have signed up to take an African American literature course online; it's part of Excellcior College. It is important to me to continue to chip away at my degree so that I will be able to obtain that much covoted piece of paper sooner rather than later.

I'm four days in now and everything is starting to feel just a tiny bit more manageable. Once I master the public trasportation and the language my normal confidence will return to me. I imagine that a month from now I'll have grown significantly.

The great thing about this whole journey is that every day is different and challanging. For now I look forward to seeing what tomorrow brings.

ThinkWriteAct moves to Colombia

2009-01-06T11:48:00.000-08:00

It feels like years since my last post, but there is a very good reason for it. I am currently on day three of my 7 months here in Bogota, Colombia. I have been planning for it for quite some time, but nothing was ever going to prepare me. From now on this blog will be about my time here. If there is any news regaurding the Bill of Rights Project, I will post it here as well, but expect less about that and more about my adventures here in the south.

I must admit, these first few days have been tough. The altitude has hit my body pretty hard, I hope that with a few days I'll feel normal again. Also, everything still feels quite alien. My grandparents have been great, and it means a lot that they are so happy to have me here and have really welcomed me into their home, but still, it's a new place, further away from my family than I've ever lived, and they don't speak my language.

I knew this was going to be a challenge, it's a big reason why I moved here, and I do have faith that I will get my footing soon enough, but right now I must admit I'm a bit sad and homesick. I took a nice long walk today around my grandparent's neighborhood, and that did help. Tonight I'm going over to my grandmother's brother's place for dinner and to meet more relatives. Tomorrow I need to start cracking on getting my job lined up.

I will try to update pretty regularly, and I will start adding photos as soon as I start taking some. I have no idea what to expect from the time I spend here, but I know whatever happens I'll be stronger and smarter for it. I will continue to approach this as an adventure and keep myself open to possibilities, the rest is up to fate.

Wish me luck.

The end is just a new beginning

2008-12-08T21:30:00.000-08:00

So... it's over.

But not really. Really, it's just beginning.

The second show went quite well. There was plenty of chaos and confusion, but overall, it went quite well. There was a pretty nice crowd and I know we got the live stream working from our end somewhere near the beginning of the show. I never did find out if it worked anywhere else, but I did see a spike in my internet views that day.

I created something that I can be really proud of. I can point to it and know that I have affected people. I have hard data and statistics to back me up. And I know that there is also so much beyond the stuff you can measure. I can look at this project and see all the things I did right, and all I could have done more of. I know that next time, I'll have a better idea of how to most successfully execute me vision. I feel that much closer now.

I'm changed. That much I know. I imagine the effects of that will continue and ricochet in all kinds of strange ways. A pattern I picked up on recently is that I'm meeting a lot of people who are new to New York. There's Miranda who moved here from Texas, Luis who just move from Lancaster, Andrew from Oregan, Nicholas from Florida, Allison from London, Rashid from prison, Morgan and Brooke from New Jersey. Our paths are crossing now for a reason. Only time will tell what that reason is.

Morgan is making a documentary of the the whole project. I don't know when it will be ready but I'm very excited to see how it turns out. Last night Miranda and I went over the Allison's (the make up artist for the first performance who I met in a Kinkos while making stickers) last night. We were her muses for a make-up project she is doing. Sadly I will not get to take part in the biggest part of the project because I'm leaving for Colombia, but Miranda will get to be a part of it. And tonight we are meeting up with Luis at the Bowery Poetry Club to discuss a soap box idea he is cooking up and how we might be involved.

This project will have an afterlife, that much seems clear. Just how long of one, and what that life produces, is all up to you. Just remember, it's never too late.

The day before once more

2008-12-03T19:29:00.000-08:00

So I'm back to show time. Will it go differently? I think it will. I know it will. But will it be better? Who is to say?

I let my expectation of a big crowd psych me out last time. I assume this audience will be smaller, and I'm okay with that. But I think the people who do show up will get a lot out of the experience. I'm taking a completely different approach. I'm sure after it is all over I'll still kick myself once I think of at least 5 things that I could have done better, but i don't care about that. I care about what happens in that room.

Things are looking good on the live stream front, so hopefully, if everything goes according to plan, you will be able to watch the show from any computer on earth. That's the idea at least. It'll be a nice alternative if you can't actually come to the show. I'll give you updates as I get them. I'll try, on the day of the show, posting instructions on how to watch from home. I've got my fingers crossed.

I've been thinking a lot today about people stuck in a rooms together. Often times we share our spaces with people and never even take the time to know them. Especially here in the city. We share park steps, grass, and pavement, we share subways cars, apartments, and bathrooms. And we do it all very close together. But we are strangers.

This performance is about getting to know each other. With any luck I will show you why I think I'm special, and why I think you are pretty important too. I like asking questions. Be prepared to answer a few. There will be colored markers involved. Bring an open mind and a willingness to participate.

I went to Fuerzabruta tonight. I think it was exactly where I was supposed to be. I loved that the audience was part of the show. I also love that was an experience. I recommend taking a look at the link, and then going to see the show. It was the one show I was told time and time again that I had to go see before I left the city, and they were all right. I'm really happy I went. I had a really great time. If you go, make sure to bring a change of clothes :).

Tomorrow I'm going to wonder off somewhere. I will let the streets of new york guide me. And Friday, I will have a show for you.

Giving thanks

2008-11-26T09:46:00.000-08:00

So I know my updates are getting more spread out. I've been distancing myself from the project. Not because I'm sick of it, but because I'm slowly letting go. This project has been the central part of my life for close to 3 months; even longer if you count all the time I spent thinking about it before I got off my butt and got it done. I'm hoping it will continue on after I leave for Colombia, but after December my participation will be reduced to updating the website.

The distance has been good, and I think the show on December 5th will be all the better for it. I would like to dedicate this post, on the day before Thanksgiving, to all the people that have helped me throughout this process. The personal contributions and conversations from people have been what have made this project so special. I've listed them in alphabetical order (save a few very important people). If you think your name should be on this list, or would like your name removed, just let me know. I'm hoping to keep adding to it as needed. Without any further ado...

THANK YOU:

Karen Gomez - mother, convinced me stickers were the way to go, printing, party planner.
Humberto Gomez - father, told me he was proud of me for doing this project.
Stefani Gomez - sister, pushed me to do this project when it was still just a seedling of an idea, helped edit my written stuff at the beginning
Jennifer Gomez - sister, party planner, music maker
Miranda McCauley - my right hand, sticker distributor, performer
Morgan Goldin - director and cinematographer for "How Would a Real Patriot Act?", technical adviser, sticker distributor
Thea Arthen - sticker distributor, California
Alexander Acosta - sticker distributor, Brooklyn
Lauren Appel - sticker distributor, Brooklyn
Ken Beasley - marketing
John Burgos - sticker distributor, assisted me with odds and ends
Rashid Beckham - performer, sticker distributor
John Benefeld - sticker distributor, introduced to many other artists, many of whom took stickers.
Marley Bewighouse - sticker distributor, Asheville, North Carolina
Kelly Brightbill - sticker distributor, California
Kim Cox - sticker distributor, New York, NY
Daniel Catanach - sticker distributor, New York, NY
Andrew Corsa - project participant, sticker distributor, Syracuse, NY
Taina Cortez - sticker distributor, up state NY
Steve Cannon - allowed me to put a sticker in his theater's (Tribes) bathroom
Jen Carlson - sticker distributor, Emmaus, PA
Alexandra Cohen - performer in film "How would a real patriot act?"
Victoria Farrell - editor for "How Would a Real Patriot Act?"
Dan Gallent - allowed me to put stickers in all the bathrooms at Nuyorican Poets Cafe
Florent Gonthier - set up my stat counter, helped encourage me when my energy waned
Robert Gillespie - performer and key grip for "How Would a Real Patriot Act"
Greg Heller-LaBelle - sent me political music, compiled a list of resources to educate myself with, sticker distributor, Bethlehem, PA
John Headley - sticker distributor, Boston, MA
Murj Holmes - sticker distributor, Brooklyn, NY
Ulysses Heyward - performer in "How Would a Real Patriot Act?"
William Flynn Handhausen - performer and co-cinematographer for "How Would a Real Patriot act?"
Roselle Ignacio - computer tech helper, sticker distributor, Philadelphia, PA
Anthony Johnson - marker donation, sticker distributor, Brooklyn, PA
Andrew Kocher - performer, writer of "Declaration of the American People", sticker distributor, New York, NY
Kumiko Kousaka - moral support, sticker distributor, Maryland
Evelyn Kulubi - sticker distributor, Brooklyn, NY
Mohan Kunungo - gave me my second performance at DROM on Friday, December 5th at 6pm.
Deena Levy - allowed me to sticker the bathrooms at her acting studio, and reminded me I have nothing to be afraid of.
Eda Lopez-Lennards - took a sticker, gave me a $5 donation, and put me in contact with her son Jose, who has been helping at risk kids get interested in the performing arts for the whole of his adult life
Jose Lopez - will hopefully be helping me integrate this project with his kids that he is helping
Pat Lombardo - helped with "How Would a Real Patriot Act?"
Randy Luna - helped me with my dance
Michael Murphy - Sticker distributor, Bloomfield, NJ
Audrey Morrell - moral support, sticker distributor, New York, NY
Jen Morrell - sticker distributor, along the path of her trip across the country
Nicholas Monaco - photographer, sticker distributor, New York, NY
Luis Mojica - sticker distributor, New York, NY
Chris Martin - helped me realize that this project needed to be
Ryan Murphy - First assistant director and performer for "How Would a Real Patriot Act?"
Rami Nasr - webmaster
Jason Noel - sticker distributor, New York, NY
Rose Ortiz - odds and ends helper
Nellie Perrera - helped me stay the course by having periodical check-ins
Brooke Pustowalow - photographer, sticker distributor, NJ
Edgardo Parado - helped with "How Would a Real Patriot Act"
Jason Quaicoo - sticker distributor, Brooklyn, NY
Donna Rusk - sticker distributor, New York, NY
Phillip Joseph Restine - sticker distributor, New York, NY
Tony Riley - sticker distributor, New York, NY and Cleavland, OH
Steve Sapp - mentor, sticker distributor, wherever he travels with his theater company
Christine Scharf - sticker distributor, Astoria, NY
Andrew Schultz - sticker distributor, Astoria, NY
Kristi Sangster - sticker distributor, New York, NY
Sumintra Saitep - sticker distributor, Upstate NY
Allison Smith - Hair and makeup for performance
Josh Tonkay - sticker distributor, Bethlehem, PA
Sean Uddard - sticker distributor, Bethlehem, PA
Mitch Van Dusen - tech advice, sticker distributor, New York, NY
Jay Wegman - my boss, gave me the space, the stickers, and the postcards to make my idea happen.
Steve Wilt - created some cool art for the project, sticker distributor, Allentown, PA
Yinna Wang - makeup artist for "How Would a Real Patriot Act?"
Nick Walker - sticker distributor, Hoboken, NJ, and Brooklyn, NY

I have such a swelling sense of gratitude and pride that this list is as long as it is. This project has been such a gift, it has meant so much to be able to share it with all of you.

Second Chances

2008-11-21T09:04:00.000-08:00

So I have spent the past few days giving myself a tiny bit of distance from the project. I feel quite refreshed. I have gotten a couple comments from friends and family about how I have been too hard on myself in regards the the performance this past Sunday. After giving it plenty of thought, I have to disagree, and also clarify a bit.

I'm really proud of what I produced this past Sunday. Even though it didn't go according to plan, I still think I accomplished something special, and I actually think I got a lot more out of the experience than I would have had it gone off without a hitch. The only reason I am being so critical of myself is because I know it will help the next performance be better. This isn't me being hard on myself, because I'm not beating myself up about it, it's just about being honest about what I want and what I'm hoping to accomplish.

Going into this next performance I am attempting to be much more objective. I think the beauty and danger of this project has a lot to do with how personal it is to me. I have invested an insane amount of myself in this whole thing and it's hard to not let that carry you away. This project managed to invade every part of my life, down to my sleeping and eating patterns. What I'm trying to do with these last two weeks is remain committed to the project without it consuming my soul. Now that I've had just a bit of distance, I feel all the more capable of getting the real work done.

I've already got the December 5th performance outlined in my head, and now I've got two weeks to add the substance and polish. I also plan on billing that night as a second chance/ going away party. I'm leaving my beloved NYC on December 12th, so the 5th will be the last chance for anyone who wants to see me before I leave for Colombia. I hope you all come out.

Processing

2008-11-17T19:36:00.000-08:00

So now that the day is over and I have some hindsight, naturally, I've spent this whole day thinking about what I messed up during the performance. The two main things were, rushing and not getting people on to the stage from the very beginning. I think towards the last few days leading up to the show, my expectations got the better of me. I let my dreams of a room full of people all coming out for the cause, muddy the reality that it's hard to get people to show up anywhere, let alone when you've had little to no publicity.

I feel foolish, but I think I learned more about me than I was expecting. I have another chance to do this show right, and this time I know what I want to prepare. December 5th at 6pm. It's a strange time and it will be a completely different vibe, but it will be a second chance for everyone. I'm already getting ideas and I think with these next two weeks I have, I'm going to write something really good. The audience will still be part of the show, but this time I'm going to share more. It's about time I use my voice for me.

This project made me revisit a mistake at I made at a performance last year. Last year I also got unexpectedly got stuck in a bigger space, and didn't bring the audience on stage with me. The weird part about it is that in both instances, I had every intention of doing that when planning the show. To me, that means i really need to examine and understand what made me make this particular mistake.

I'm trying really hard not to beat myself up about it though. It does no good playing the shoulda coulda woulda game. The performance on Sunday had not a single rehearsal, and happened so spontaneously, and people had a good time and even made some thoughtful contributions. But December's performance will have a real plan. It will be quite different from Sunday, but the spirit will be even stronger. This is our second chance to do this project justice. How lucky is that?

What's Next?

2008-11-16T21:06:00.000-08:00

Today went really well. I'll get some footage up soon. It didn't go as planned in many ways, but the basic elements were definitely there. And people had a good time. Yes, there were plenty of things I could have done better, but the important part is that I did it at all.

I sit here wanting to write about it, I want to be able to explain what happened on my end today. I think the worst thing I did was worry too damn much about wasting other people's time. I rushed the music going into the show because I was flustered that we were running behind. It is frustrating and interesting that it happened. It's something I thought I had left behind me, but it turns out, I still worry about boring people. I'm not sure what that is about, especially because I really do feel like a confident person. And yet, today, when I should have made my rightful claim to the stage, I backed down. I still did it, and I still am quite proud of the show, but it is important to me that I learn the lesson I am supposed to from this.

And what lesson is that? Stop apologizing. And keep going.

Today's the Day!

2008-11-15T21:25:00.001-08:00

So I'm getting ready to try and go to bed so I can rest up for the big day. I'm sure my mind will be up for plenty longer though. Bring a pen and perhaps some crayons. There will be free food and wine. Yum :).

The address:
Abrons Art Center
466 Grand St.
New York, NY 10002
212-598-0400

The show starts at 3. We are in the Playhouse.

There are many special thanks that need to be made. I plan on devoting some time to it in the coming days. I hope to see you in another 14 hours or so. For now, check out the great photos Brooke took during the filming:
Film Day

3 more days!!! - nearing the finish line

2008-11-13T15:27:00.000-08:00

Before I begin, I'd like to direct you to two blogs. The first is by Andrew Corsa, he's written a new entry about his participation in this project. The second is by a good friend of mine, Greg Heller-LaBelle. He wrote an article about Obama as our President, and what his victory means. They are really interesting posts, I highly recommend them.

I saw this ad as I was coming out of the loft party I was at last night, near 37th St. and 8th Ave, and I saw this sign. Silly me couldn't figure out how fix the camera setting so it's all blurred (i still like it though), I'm going to try to go back but what it says is "Eat your vegetables. Finish your homework. Respect Women. And then there is a kid with a hoodie on that says "awaiting instructions." I felt the need to post one of my stickers right under the sign on the shirt.

The ad is for endabuse.org, The Family Violence Provention Fund. I think it's a really interesting ad, and I think my sticker goes well with it.

We are entering in to the final stretch. I'm quite stunned by the effect this has had on me. There have been some set backs, and the performance on Sunday will not appear exactly how I have it in my head, but I think the final result is going to be better than anything I could dream up.

Yesterday was a really great day project wise. I had a meeting with this guy named Mohar. His cousin has a bar/lounge called Drom on Ave A between 5th and 6th that just opened up 8 months ago. They have offered me an opportunity to produce the show a second time. Because of the nature of the show, the second showing has the potential for very different results. I'm thinking it'll be an excellent follow up to the show on Sunday. It'll give us a chance to touch base again and really solidify our efforts. Plus since I'll have two weeks in between, it'll give me a chance to make it even better. It is a dinner theater type thing, so people will be asked to spend about $20 a person, but the food looks pretty good and it comes with the show. I will still keep it free of charge, but I will be putting out a donation box for both performances.

What also made yesterday good was getting some help in an unexpected way. Yesterday I was working on the project and I had my e-mail open. This guy Jason, who took 10 stickers from me in Williamsburg last Monday, IMs me and starts chatting, asking about the project such. After chatting a while he asked if there was anything he could do to help me because he had the whole day free. I decided to take him up on it and asked him to meet me at my appointment to pick up stickers. He showed up on time, insisted I give him 40 stickers instead of 20 and he also took 40 postcards. And he even thanked me because he said had he not helped he would have just sat around in his pajamas all day. How cool is that?

I am consistently surprised by how much this project really resonates with people. When I was in Williamsburg this past Tuesday, I actually heard someone use the word serendipitous to describe my project. She was a teacher and they were just about to study the Constitution in school. Hopefully she'll come to the show. Another funny thing from that day was that towards the end of the day there was an Irish guy and an English guy who had been drunk for three days and were looking to kill time. Tyson decided he was going to make it his mission to help hand out the free iPod cases and Justin passed out my stickers. He gave out a good 30 in half an hour.

Sometimes it's just about giving people something to do. While there are many people in the world who are busy with an insane amount of work, there are many more who have an insane amount of time on their hands. It's always nice when we can give them something productive to do.

This Saturday I'll be at the rally at City Hall at 1:30pm to protest Proposition 8. I'm going to be there with my stickers. I think it will be the best way to spend my final day before the performance. And it is also an important cause. I think I'll post one last time the night before the show. I'm telling you now, bring a pen.

6 more days - Grand Central

2008-11-10T18:59:00.001-08:00

So I don't want to make this long, but I feel a need to write a bit about my day at Grand Central Terminal.

I gave out a total of 92 stickers to 60 people in 5 hours. While I have done better volume wise other places, the people Miranda and I attracted today really connected with us. I started off the day with a guy who asked us what we were doing as we were setting up and he liked the project so much that he took two stickers and gave me $2. He insisted I make a donations cup. And he was right, I made $7.85 today.

We also talked to a guy named Saul who initially kept walking when I asked him if he wanted a sticker, but then came back even after he'd left the building. He ended up taking 11 stickers. He seemed genuinely inspired by the project. He talked to us for a good 20 minutes. One thing he said that stuck with me was "It doesn't take much to be helpful." And it's true, often times help doesn't need to cost us anything. I think a lot of people do want to help, they just don't know how. I'm hoping we'll come up with some great ideas on Sunday.

There was another woman at the end that really made an impression. Her name was Eda, and she stopped to talk. Turns out she used to take acting classes at Abrons Art Center back in the day. And she told us about her son Jose that has been working in performance programs for at risk kids since he was 16. She gave us a $5 donation and called her son on the spot so I could talk to him.

Tomorrow I'm going to go back to Williamsburg from 2-5. I had good luck there last Monday, I'm hoping tomorrow will go even better.

We're getting so close. I can't wait to see you all!

p.s. This Thursday the ACLU is doing this town hall meeting thing. I signed up. Check it out if you want: We're hosting an open Town Hall Meeting on Thursday, November 13, when concerned citizens from all across the nation will gather via teleconference to develop an all-out campaign to encourage Barack Obama to take decisive steps towards freedom on day one. As an ACLU supporter, you are invited. Sign up to participate in this important conversation.

One more week (!) - Film Day

2008-11-09T18:51:00.000-08:00

Today was a long but great day. A friend from college, Morgan Goldin, is making a film for the project. Today was the one and only day we had to shoot it. We worked from 11-6:20ish. I'm really excited to see it all put together. It will be appearing in the performance on Sunday.

The picture to the right really captures one of the many things I love about this project. This is Miranda and Ulysses. They just met today, and while they waited to film their scene they built something with the blocks in the room. I love that this project brings people together. And more impressively, it brings people together that you really want to meet. I also get tickled when adults do "kid" stuff. It's always nice to be reminded that getting older does not mean you must stop having fun.

The day was hard work, I can't even count how many times I ran up and down two flights of stairs today, but I had a blast doing it. We filmed everything in the various bathroom stalls through the art center. I'm posting more photos on my photobucket. One of my goals for this week is to organize the photos better. There have been some pretty cool ones.

It's coming up fast now. I think I've got just enough time to accomplish all that I need to. I'm really looking forward to performance day. I feel like it's going to be really special, not just for me, but for all of us. As it turns out the performance has been moved from the tiny 70 seat recital hall to the 300 seat beautiful playhouse. It's a big space to fill, but a great one.

Tomorrow I will be at Grand Central Terminal near the subways from 10am-4pm. And I'll be at Bedford and 7th off the L line this Tuesday from 2pm-5pm. I'll try to schedule one more sitting day through out the week, but I haven't decided when yet. I've got 500 stickers and my goal is to hand them all out by the end of the day Tuesday. I've never come close to that before, but I dunno, I've got a good feeling about this week.

10 days to go - A lot to hope for

2008-11-06T12:17:00.000-08:00

So first off, YAAAAAAAAAAY!!!! The election went smoothly, McCain conceded by 11pm, and we all got to hear the next President of the United States speak of what's to come. I predicted Obama was going to win by a landslide as soon as it was clear he was the Democratic candidate. A lot of people seemed to think I was delusional, though many appreciated my confidence. Now that the election is finally over we can start thinking seriously about what we must do to prepare for a new era.

After the speech on Tuesday night a part of me wanted to jump online immediately and start writing up a storm, but knowing I'd never get to bed I decided to sleep soundly instead. Now I have a lot to catch up on. Let's start with some pictures...

This was taken on Monday on the corner of N. 7th St. and Bedford in Williamsburg. This was where I set up shop that day. It was such a good spot that I plan on going back at least one or two more times before the show. These kids were some of my favorite of the day. They came running from across the street screaming "I want a sticker! I want a sticker!" Then when they saw what the stickers were of, they decided to wear them. They also took a few more to put in the bathrooms at school. I actually got to talk to quite a few kids that day, and that made me really happy. That is who is most important to reach right now and this past Monday was the first time I got to really talk to younger kids.

Miranda and I got some pleasant and unexpected company that day too. We set up the signs right next to this guy John who was giving out free iPod cases to promote the opening of a new store down the street. The store is called PeachFrog. It opened on November 1st. It was nice because he was good company and we ended up helping each other out. When people stopped to talk to him he let them know we were handing out stickers. When he got sick or yelling "free iPod cases!" he would go into a round of "Free Stickers!" It was nice to have him around.

I really love this photo. This is my view of Williamsburg from where I was sitting. I thought it was such a cool picture I wanted to share it. One thing that I haven't been doing that I really wish I would have is get good pictures of the places I've been sitting for hours at a time handing out stickers. It would have been nice. Oh well, next time.

The day over all was a great success. I managed to hand out 115 stickers in 3 hours to a total of 60 people.

The was one minor annoyance of the day that angered me a lot more than I'd really like to admit. At the very beginning of the day, while Miranda and I were still setting up the signs these three older guys stopped and asked us what we were doing. So I go into my little speech about the stickers and creating change in small ways and even before I've finished the one guy starts telling me how I'm wasting my time. He then goes on to tell me how the US was going to be taken over by marshal law by February and how all the money is going to change and that our dollar would only be worth a nickel. Now, this is not the first time I've heard stuff like this, but what made me so mad was how condescending he was, he went as far as to tell me I was living in a bubble for not agreeing with him. He insisted McCain was going to win, and when I kind of laughed and asked him if he wanted to put money on that he responded by saying that even if Obama did win that he would just be a puppet. The thing that makes me so mad about people like this is simple: these are the people who are spewing the most hate and negativity in the air, and they are the ones who are doing the least. These are the people who refuse to vote because they insist it makes no difference, and I feel pretty safe assuming this guy isn't volunteering his time to do anything productive. The thing that did surprise me about the exchange is that he did take a sticker, and a friend he was with took 5.

The day was filled with plenty of interesting tid-bits. Like the girls who were excited about the stickers and said they planned on posting them on their dad's car (i'm a little scared they will), listening the the crazy rantings of a guy who is apparently a regular to that street corner. He did say one interesting thing: "the reproductive system has never been able to locate the soul." Then there was the girl from VICE magazine who wanted to ask Miranda and I our thoughts on pubic hair.

I have ten days to go and I am happy to say I think I've got a pretty great day lined up for all of us. These last days are all about polishing and writing and re-writing. I will be at Grand Central Terminal this Monday 10-4 (or until I run out of stickers). The days leading up to the performance I hope to give you some more in depth up-dates.

The main thing that has kept me from updating more frequently is my strange need for a lot of sleep. Also, I've been making a conscious effort to not spend more than 4 hours a day on this project. I feel it is necessary for my sanity. Another unexpected side effect of this project is weight loss. I've lost 8 pounds since starting this project. It's a little overwhelming how much this project has become a part of who I am.

I really need to get going. I'll try to write some more later.

p.s. who do I know in Latvia?

Two more weeks - Two days until the election!

2008-11-02T17:09:00.000-08:00

Before I forget, Nicholas Monaco wrote a blog about me, he's got lots of cool pictures.

So much has happened in the past few days. I feel like I have been running non-stop. Luckily I'm still getting enough sleep, but it's insane how much this project has become part of who I am. I've had so many social engagements with so many intelligent, interesting people that it is now becoming difficult to explain them all. I would like to spend some time writing a peice about all of them, but I don't think I'm in the mindset to do it at this moment.

But if this helps put it into perspective, I had at least 17 hours of intelligent discourse over the course of the past 6 days. And that's not even counting the time I've gotten to spend just talking with my roommates at home, or the e-mails that I've been writing back and forth. I think by any standards, that's pretty damn good.

I also saw two of the most inspiring documentaries I've seen in quite some time. The first was called "You can't stay neutral on a Moving train" by Howard Zinn. He's a pretty incredible person, I recommend watching it. The one that I saw that was even cooler was called "The Future We Will Create" by TED. This is one that I picked at random, and this one, this one is exactly what I'm talking about. I made a profile there today, I'm going to find some time to figure out how it all works. I really can't recommend both the film and the website enough.

My sister sent me a mix cd for my project, I'm going to have to figure out how to put it online somewhere. I'll figure it out. I think we're still going to tweek it a little, but I must say, I was amazed by the depth and understanding and style the was embodied in the music. With just a bit more polish it'll knock your socks off.

I always knew this project was a good idea, but I don't think I understood how good an idea until I started getting into it. I've realized that to really make this project complete, I need to find someone to stream the performance piece live on the internet. The guy I had a meeting with today, Andrew, he suggested I talk to downtowntv.com. I certainly will prusue it, but if anybody reading this has a suggestion on how to make this happen, please, tell me your brilliant idea.

We're two days from the election. I assume if you are reading this, you are going to be voting. We are headed into a new era, I think we can all feel it. We are the ones who get to shape it. I've met so many smart and motivated people in the past few months, and I know that there are so many more out there that we will hear from soon enough.

Today I had so much energy coursing through my body I danced for over an hour, wrote for over an hour, and drew a pretty powerful piece. I'm in the heat of it now, these next two weeks are going to fly; get ready for the take off :).

Declaration of the American People

2008-10-29T09:06:00.000-07:00

This was e-mailed to me on Monday night. It's pretty interesting and absolutely worth reading. I would really love it if you could read this and give me your honest thoughts on it.

Start commenting, I want to hear from you.

Begin..
My Fellow Americans,
I have been nominated by the Worker's Organized Liberation Front to commit our political philosophy to the written word. We have chosen the Declaration of Independance as our guide in presenting our sentiments, striving to keep with the original spirit of the document while expressing the concerns of the modern American. Please carefully consider the concepts within the following Declaration and also the future of our United States of America.

A DECLARATION OF THE AMERICAN PEOPLE

When, in the course of human events, it becomes necessary for the American people to dissolve the political commitments which have connected us with a centralized Federal Government, and to assume among the powers of the Earth the shape and spirit of a Democracy which reflects the inalienable rights to which the laws of nature entitle us; a decent respect for the opinions of humanityrequires that we should Declare the causes which impel us to make a charge of No Confidence

We, the People, hold these truths to be self-evident, that all humanity is created equal, that we are endowed by our very existence with certain inalienable rights, and that among these are Life, Liberty,Access to the bounty of unspoiled lands and the fruits thereof; Clean air, Pure water, and the pursuit of happiness.

To secure these rights, governments are instituted over communities, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed. The American people maintain that whenever any form of governmentbecomes destructive of these ends, by failing to uphold these rights, it is the moral obligation of the People to alter or abolish it, and institute in its place a new government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its obligations in such a form as to provide for environmentally sound behavior towards the Biosphere Earth; and shall seem most likely to effect our safety, health and happiness.

Common sense will dictate that a government long esablished should not be changed for light and transient reasons and accordingly, experience shows that humankind are more disposed to suffer when corruption, pollution, and other evils are bearable, than to correct the evil by abolishing the corruption and pollution to which we have become accustomed.

But, when a long series of abuses, deceptions and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same object, exposes a design to reduce the American people under absolute corporate despotism, it is our right and our moral obligation to throw off such government and provide a new form of government by the People to provide for our future security.

Such has been the patient sufferance of the American people and such is now the necessity which rallies us to alter or abolish the present Federal Government. The history of the present Federal Government of our United States of America is one of repeated deception and usurpation, having in direct object the establishment of a corporate tyranny over the American population. To demonstrate this, let the facts be submitted to a World in Peril.

Multi-national corporations, by their very nature, can have no commitment to national patriotism, and therefore cannot be loyal to any one nation or political ideology. The only obligation of a multi-national corporation is to make profit. Therefore, they exist only to exploit the world population in the quest for ongoing profit.

We, the People of America, have been deprived of our inalienable rights.

The Federal Government has failed to represent the American People, either as individuals or en masse, as intended by the Constitution of the United States and the Bill of Rights. We have learned that "Free Trade" does not guarantee individual freedom and that Federal over-legislation provides the opportunity for the Federal Government to reach into the home, or hovel, of every American.

We, the People, have been deprived of our inalienable right to the bounty of unspoiled land, Clean air and Pure water.

The Federal Government allows multi-national corporations to dominate and exploit the natural resources of America, and to restrict the access of American citizens to the natural world, due to, and as a result of, criminal exploitation of our environment. These same multi-national corporations continue to exploit the American People through marketing experimentation and the quest for ongoing profit by establishing the complete dependancy of the American population on corporate production and distribution for the necessities of life.

The Federal Government has employed deception and evasion in order to persuade the American People to offer up their patriotism and progeny on the altar of corporate profit.

The Federal Government promotes military aggression and the enhancement of a worldwide ideological struggle for dominion in order to create market opportunities for, and further promote the agenda of, multi-national corporations towards globalization of the world economy and the complete domination of the People.

We, therefore, the People of America, appealing to the judgement of the natural force of the universe for the moral righteousness of our intentions, do solemnly publish and Declare that the American People are, and of right ought to be, free and independant people, that We are absolved from all allegiance to a Federal Government dominated in policy and spirit by multi-national corporations, and that all political connection between the American People and the Federal Government is, and of right ought to be, totally dissolved, and that as a free and independant People, We have the power to reform our government, establish an ecologically sustainable and moral co-existence with the Bioshere Earth and the Human Race, contract alliances, conduct peace, levy war and do all other acts and things which independant people of inalienable right do, and, for the support of this Declaration of the American People, with a firm reliance on the protection of divine providence, We mutually pledge to each other our lives, our futures, and our sacred honor.

Andrew Jackson Kocher
Copyright 2008 Andrew Jackson Kocher

end...

17 days to go - Yay for collaboration!

2008-10-29T08:36:00.000-07:00

I feel behind on my updates. In the doing of the project, taking the time to sit and reflect 'on paper' seems to have taken a bit of a back seat.

The number of elements that are going into this project have been growing. Primarily, the number of people who have been dipping their toes in the contribution fountain. In the past week I've met a teacher who works with troubled 7th grade boys in the Bronx who has expressed interest in using my project as part of a lesson for her students. I met a man in the park who e-mailed me a manifesto that he wrote. I have also met a couple people who have taken healthy stacks of stickers who plan on helping me get some groups together. And that is on top of the friends who have taken photos, helped me design a good postcard, and are preparing to make a short film.

To the left you can see a photo by Nicholas Monoco. He has gotten into the project and has been generous enough to donate his time and photography to the cause. I'm going to post more of his photos on my photobucket. There are many good ones. This is the first image of myself that I have posted on the website. I'm on the right side of the photo, on the left you can see my roommate Miranda. She has gone above and beyond with her help on the project.

There is a lot that needs to be done in the next two and a half weeks. One of the reasons I haven't been updating much is because I've been letting my mind focus on what I'm going to be doing for the show. I honestly have no idea how much time I spend sitting deep in thought. I know I'm working things out and I know I'm making progress, but now it's really about getting what's in my head out into the world.

The one thing I'm pretty proud of myself for is my ability to handle my stress level. I decided a long time ago that I would not let this project become a source of stress in my life. For the most part it's been easy because I have such a great time working on it. But it's important that my lack of stress doesn't turn into procrastination. Luckily it's pretty easy for me to tell that I really am working hard, regaurdless of how often I update. My goal is to continue to give you news at least twice a week until the show.

After show, I think, will be when the real interesting work will begin. I know I have been counting down the days until the performance, but I really hope to emphasize that that is not when the project ends, I'm hoping that is where it will really begin. There are no limits to when or where this project ends. The only difference is that I will be playing a slightly more passive role. I'll continue to update the blog, and to organize what people send me, but this project is my gift to everyone. You have just as much control over where this project goes as I do.

This Saturday I am going to be handing out stickers at First Saturday at the Brooklyn Museum. If you have never been to this event, I would highly recommend it. It's completely free, and there's always good music, film, and speakers. Come check it out and take a sticker.

For now I must get back to being productive.

23 days to go - sick day

2008-10-24T17:54:00.000-07:00

Today, I did nothing. I stayed at home, in bed, reading. It's all the energy I had. I think some days it's just best to stay in bed. Lucky for me other people were out working for me. Miranda, the awesome roommate that she is, went to a Tally Hall and Jukebox the Ghost concert today. Apparently my stickers were quite the hit. Take a look at the newest pictures. I'll try to get it all properly labeled tomorrow.

Tuesday I got to meet with photographer Nicholas Monaco. Take a look at his website, his photos are quite something. He's thinking about doing a photo essay on the Bill of Rights. He's offered to come out on Monday while I hand out stickers. Which I will be doing from 3pm-8pm in Grand Central Station. I haven't decided the exact place I'm setting up, but I'll be in the big vaulted room with my signs. Come pick up some stickers and get your picture taken. It should be a fun day.

Today I rested up because I knew it was the best thing I could do for my body and mind. I'm really glad I did too, because I feel like tomorrow will be better. And I can rest easy knowing that my project can exist without me every now and then. I'm going to post the new photos and head to bed. Hopefully I'll be back to myself tomorrow.

26 Days to go - Follow through

2008-10-21T09:49:00.000-07:00

I have to say, I had the best birthday I have ever had. From beginning to end I was reminded how lucky I am to have so many people who love and believe in me. I returned home at 2 am Saturday night wanting to write about all the thoughts that rushed through me through out the day, but of course, once I got into bed I was out cold.

One of many awesome things that happened on my birthday occurred while at the BAM after seeing Religulos (it's a great documentary, go see it). I was sitting in a stall after the movie while wondering if any of my stickers that I had posted over a month ago were still there when a girl in the very next stall said "why is the Bill of Rights in the bathroom stall? (to her friend) Do you have one in your stall?" The friend did not, but I took advantage of the opportunity and quickly passed her a sticker under the stall and said "here, have another." She asked me what to do with it, and I told her to follow the link and it would explain everything. By the time I came out of my stall the girl was gone, but there was a line out the door. I came out of the building jumping up and down I was so happy.

That night my friends and I went to the same artist loft I went to last Wednesday for free jazz and good times. I was welcomed back with open arms and had a great time passing out stickers and talking to people. I got two questions that I was unable to give articulate answers to at the time, but I would like to take a crack at it now.

Question #1: What does a document that was written over 200 years ago have to do with the present?
Answer #1: Everything. We need to know where we came from to know where we are going. This document was written to try to protect the people. This is what the founders believed to be irrefutable rights to every American (well, white men who were property owners to be more accurate). They wrote it because they had enough with the British government and were trying something new. It's important to examine these rights, precisely because over two hundred years have past. It's important to know what you think about this. I want people to start thinking about the historical documents that are yet to be written and how we can influence their contents.

Question #2: What's in it for me? Why am I personally doing this project?
Answer #2: What's not in it for me is a better question. Well, in the long run, I'm hoping it means I get to influence thought and action in the country. I don't know what the exact effects of this project will be, but just judging what has happened in the past 7 weeks, I know they will be far reaching. But it goes so much further than that for me. This project makes me happy, for one. I can't tell you how gratifying it is to really follow through with something. Especially something as important as this. Also, this is my first major art project. This is all experimenting and discovering what works and what doesn't. All the things I am learning are bound to help me with future projects. I have had my mind expanded, I have made new friends, I am getting to collaborate with other artists, I have inspired people who are close to me. To be honest, I have yet to find the downside of this project. I'm beginning to think it is because there isn't one.

It's getting to the point where something is happening every day. Whether it's someone asking questions out loud in the stall, or finding a comment in a bathroom, or hearing from someone who wants to collaborate with me. Things are happening.

My sister did me the honor of visiting on Sunday and Monday and I got to show her all the fruits of my labor as they stand now. She let me know how impressed she was and how inspiring this whole thing is. She just started a PhD program at Rutgers this fall for information science, and I've been telling her that this project would be an excellent subject for a paper for a while, but this weekend, after seeing all the work I've done, I could tell she really believed me.

I know there are many of you out there who are following this project and contributing. I've only heard from a few of you. I look forward to hearing from the rest. As you can see, my website has got spiffed up a bit over the weekend. Many thanks to one of my very best friends, Roselle Ignacio. I know there's stuff that needs to be fixed, but she helped make it easier for us all to connect.

I'll be posting more photos when I get home tonight.

More updates later this week.

One month to go

2008-10-17T09:36:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow is my birthday. Yay! I'll be 24. This getting older thing is pretty cool, I don't understand what so many people have against it. I just wanted to give a little update now because I probably won't be able to update for a few days. The celebration will be going through Monday. Part of me is a bit sad that I won't be out passing out stickers this Monday, but no worries, I'll be back soon enough.

This week has been fun. I've been trying to soak up some culture. Last night I saw "The Society" at the art center. It was an interesting piece; the thing I liked most was their use of space. They managed to do things with their set and bodies that were both entertaining and surprising. The day before that I went to see Universes and Milk&Jade by Dana Leong at the Players Theatre. It was a great night of jazz and hip hop fused together. Both groups are really interesting and a treat to watch.

Since the show I saw on Wednesday was about three blocks from Washington Square Park, and I had an hour and a half to kill before hand, I decided to hang out and pass out some stickers. I'm really glad I did too. In the first hour I was there I talked to 28 people and handed out a total of 36 stickers. I met a couple of NYU law students, a British guy, a Scottish guy, and someone who had seen my stickers in Bliss Cafe in Williamsburg. Then yesterday my roommate started talking to a socialist guy in Brooklyn and it turned out that I had talked to the same guy the day before. So either NYC is the smallest town ever, or this project is really grabbing hold.

Oh! Also, a man who I have talked to a few times in the park stopped to let me know that someone had posted my stickers on the traffic post on the north east corner of the park. I took some pictures, and I'll post them soon. One thing that caught my eye is that there was a name written on one of the stickers. I assume it's the guy who posted them. That's the first time I've seen that, I thought it was pretty cool.

Things are really rolling now, and I'm happy to say there are quite a few people getting in on the action. In the past week I've gotten an offer to collaborate on a photo essay on the Bill of Rights, and I've gotten some friends to agree to put together some music, a short film, and create a design for the post card. It's not too late for you to get involved too! Send a message to let me know how you are contributing.

Murder Mystery party tonight, and dinner and free jazz tomorrow. See you on the other side of 24.

Reaching the Mid-Point.

2008-10-13T18:19:00.000-07:00

I've had quite the weekend. It was very assuring. Today I spent three hours in Washington Square Park handing out stickers. I handed out a total of 101 stickers to 44 people. One of these days I need someone with a video camera. Just to watch the looks on people's faces when they learn about the project. Any volunteers?

Saturday I got into a two hour conversation with a man that was just released from prison 3 weeks ago after having been inside for 35 years. The most interesting part was that he didn't scare me at all. He's really intelligent, perhaps a bit out there, and really has his heart in the right place. We spent our conversation sitting by the boat pond and angel fountain in the center of central park. I walked away from the conversation feeling something had moved in me. It's something that is really hard to explain, but he felt more like a guardian than anything.

He stopped by today to get more stickers. Along with many others. I got to sit an talk with a girl I knew when I was in high school. She was a freshman when I was a senior. She's graduating from NYU this year. It was really great to talk to her and hear about what she has been up to. Then there the women from Boston that thanked me for doing the project and promised to take the stickers home with them. And the police woman who took 5 stickers to take to the officers in her precinct. And the school teacher who said he was going to put it up in his classroom. Then there was the guy named Rich who gave me a gigantic stack of literature to read. He seemed like he really knew what he was talking about, but you have to see what he was wearing to get the full picture. Lucky for us, I had my camera.

My favorite of the day were two college boys that took 26 stickers. As they were leaving I heard one of them say "Awesome, now we have something to do today."

This project has been really good for my soul. I am accomplishing something that I am really proud of. I know it means something to people. I am still figuring out how to make this more than a concept though, I really want to be a catalyst for change. My experience on Saturday really did feel like a message telling me I am on the right path. The man I talked to, Rashid, he told me, as soon as I told him about the project, that it had been ordained by some higher power that I do this. He said he was meant to meet me and help me spread the word. Plenty of the things he said could have come off as creepy, if it weren't for the fact that his was so sincere. And if I didn't agree with him. I do believe I was meant to do this project. I honestly didn't feel I had a choice. I'm someone who gets really strong gut instincts from time to time and I have learned it's in my best interest to follow. I can't imagine my life now, without this project in it. I have 34 days to go before this hits the stage. There is no doubt in my mind that November 16th will be a day I remember for the rest of my life. I feel confident saying that this will be true for everyone who shows up that day as well.

I may not check in for a few days, but you will hear from me soon enough. I'll put a few more pictures on photobucket this evening.

Month 2, Day 7 - Starting to take form

2008-10-11T08:10:00.000-07:00

First off, let me apologize for being incognito for a few days. That will happen from time to time. I find it's best for my sanity and for the quality of this project if I step away for a few days now and then.

A friend of mine, Andrew Corsa, has been participating in this project up in Syracuse, NY. He was awesome enough to put his own spin on it and write a blog post about his experience so far. Y0u can read it here. This is a very good example of the kind of thing I was hoping for when I started this project. Andrew put his thoughts and himself into his participation; he wanted results and he got them.

I've been thinking a lot about all the different elements of this project. The one that has been on my mind the past few days is the physical action this has been forcing people to make. Just the act of taking a sticker and putting it somewhere stirs things up. Or reading the Bill in a bathroom and then being curious enough to look up the link. That's action. I really love that. I can picture all these people who I may or may not ever hear from. They are out there reading and considering and doing on their own.

This past Wednesday I had the privilege of being invited to a real artist loft for a lecture on the history of improvisation in the 1960's. Aside from the lecture, there was excellent wine and cheese, live music, and good conversation. There were maybe 25-30 people who showed up over the course of the night. They showed a lot of clips from the jazz of the time, and also discussed literature and dance. Perhaps that doesn't sound all that exciting, but it certainly kept my brain churning, and I met a bunch of interesting people that I would love to cross paths with again. I got to talk to many people there about my project and got to answer many questions.

One thing I was asked was what I've come up with so far to make the country a better place. It's something I've been giving a lot of thought to, and while I do want the performance to speak for itself, we've still got six weeks to go so perhaps it's not a bad idea to start listing some stuff now. One of the main things I want to emphasizing is working from the inside out. We all are in one box or another, whether it be working in a cubical, practically living in a theater, sitting in a bathroom stall, or being glued to the computer monitor or tv. The phrase always goes "think outside the box" but I say screw that. I say you need to start with what you've got. Look around, have you really ever thought about the resources that are available to you? If you live in New York, sometimes the resources are down right overwhelming. But even just the internet can be an endless resource. A lot of us spend so much time thinking about all the things we wish we had and how to get them, but how much time do you spend thinking about what you already have?

My goal for this next week is to take advantage of a resource I am hopelessly guilty of neglecting: my local public library.

So has everyone checked the weather report for the next few days? We are lucky enough to have some down right perfect weather until at least Tuesday. I am going to do my best to take advantage of it and spend as much time as I can outside. I'll be back in Washington Square park this Monday from 4 to 8 (or whenever I run out of stickers). I will be out somewhere tomorrow, but I have yet to decide if it's going to be a work or play day. We'll just have to see.

Month 2, Day 3 - Register to vote people!

2008-10-07T08:02:00.000-07:00

Before I get on with the blog, I just wanted to let you know that Friday is the cut off day for mailing in voter registration. It's easy to register online at rockthevote.com.

Yesterday I spent 3 hours in Washington Square park. I was planning on staying 4 hours, but to my very pleasant surprise I was cleaned out by 6pm. 31 people stopped to talk, some stayed for quite a while, and I gave out over 100 stickers. The biggest bulk of the stickers were taken by two guys who I meet last week who have really gotten into this project. I forgot to ask if it was okay to mention their names, so for now, I will say no more.

When the day started out I was feeling a bit worried about the spot Miranda and I picked to set up camp. I had no idea that half of Washington Square Park is currently under construction. My prediction was that there would still be a few people who would stop, but we wouldn't get the kind of results we got in Union Square. Boy was I wrong.

30 people in 3 hours. That's 10 people an hour. Many of them stopped to talk and ask questions. It was great because it challenged me to come up with answers. There was one guy who talked to me about how he was 49 and had never voted in an election in his life, but he planned on voting for Obama in November. He said the idea that Palin was a heartbeat away from the presidency was too scary a thought to bear. There was a guy from Germany who stopped and asked me a lot of questions about the Bill and who I planned on voting for and why. I suppose it's no great surprise that I will be voting for Obama. One of the reasons I gave was that I think there is a chance he'll be able to restore our standing in the world since right now everyone hates us. He replied by saying that it wasn't that the world hated us, it was that it didn't understand what the hell we're doing.

The crowning achievement of the day though, was that I met not one but two people who had already heard about my project. One had discovered and read the Bill while he was in the bathroom at the Nuyorican Poets Cafe. The other one was an ACLU (American Civil Liberties Union) volunteer who was trying to sign up members on the street. She said she learned about it through this guy Tucker who I met maybe a month ago on the street while he was collecting money for Obama. I wondered what happened with the sticker I had given him, turns out he made photo copies and has been passing them out ever since.

With every day my confidence in the project grows. I have started to think hard about what I want this performance and town meeting to accomplish. I don't want to give too much away at this point, but I know one thing I hope to accomplish is getting people to understand what resources are available to them, should they decide they want to get involved.

I am hoping to teach and inspire people with project. The best part is that you all are already teaching and inspiring me.

End of month one.

2008-10-03T19:44:00.001-07:00

So here we are, at the end of the first month. Which means only 4 more weeks until the election. Only 6 more weeks before the performance/ town hall meeting. Have any ideas yet?

I think this project is right on track. The picture to the right is on St. Marks between A and 1st. These are De La Vega chairs. If you haven't checked out his store, I'd highly recommend it. I like that his work is playful, yet to the point. That big rectangle you see on the center chair is the Bill of Rights. I talked to De La Vega today and he said that people do read it and ask where it came from. I was lucky enough to bump in to one while I was there. His name is De La Heyman. He does a take off of what De La Vega does. He gave me a bumper sticker today that says "I hate Sarah Palin..." He also gave me a delicious chocolate drop thing from the bakery Something Sweet on 1st and 11th st.

I've posted a bunch more photos from the past week on photobucket. It covers the Art Under the Bridge Festival, my most recent day in Union Square, and the most recent bathroom graffiti.

Tomorrow and Sunday I'm taking a two day acting intensive with Deena Levy. My roommate took it and came back glowing. From what I know, it should be a pretty powerful experience. I'm hoping it will help me fuel up for the weeks ahead. Monday I will be in Washington Square Park from 3pm-7pm. I'll be somewhere near the big arch and the fountain. Come hang out, take some stickers. I've decided this is going to be an every Monday thing, weather and life permitting. I'll make sure the location changes every week.

Well it's getting late and I still need to load the pictures on photobucket. I'm turning in for now. You can expect to hear from me on Monday.

Day 26 - Another day in Union Square

2008-09-29T19:08:00.000-07:00

First, my apologies for the lack of photos this past week. My computer and camera are fighting. I've got an appointment at the Apple store on Thursday to get to the bottom of things. I've got a few good ones from the past two days.

Yesterday I spent some quality time at the Art Under the Bridge Festival in Dumbo. It was so much fun. It was a lot of open studios and interactive art set up on the sidewalks. The vibe was great, and getting to touch and play with art always makes it more fun for me.

Today I spent 4 hours in Union Square. Both my roommates came and sat with me today. It's always more fun with company. The day started off slow, but it turned into quite the productive evening. A couple of things that happened:

-This French juggler/dancer homeless guy decided to sit and talk with us for close to half an hour. He didn't take a sticker but he asked a lot of questions.

-A guy was visiting for New Orleans, he liked the project so much that he gave me his card so I could e-mail him all the information so he could help me get it going down there.

-A man and his two kids stopped to talk to me. The kids were pretty excited about the stickers. The father stood there and told the boy to read the 1st Amendment out loud. I thought that was pretty cool.

-Three girls came up to talk to me and got really excited about the project. So much so that the one girl stuck the Bill on the back of her tee-shirt. I have a picture of them, I can't wait to post it.

-This guy liked my project so much he took two stickers and donated $5.

-Towards the end of my time there this guy Felix stopped to talk to me. He was an artist too. He was was walking around Union Square with a sign that said "FREE ADVICE" and underneath it said "donations are appreciated." He had been keeping notes on people who asked advice. It seemed like a pretty interesting project.

A total of 33 people stopped to talk and took a total of 66 stickers.

I can't get over how much I enjoy working on this project. It clearly means something to the people I talk to. And I am getting to talk to so many people from every walk of life. I am realizing I still have a lot of work to do though. I need to research more. I want to know about our history and I also want to look into other countries' political documents.

There is still a lot of work (and more interesting blog entries) ahead. But for now, bedtime.

Day 22 - A pause to think

2008-09-25T17:23:00.000-07:00

So we are working into our 4th week now. The statistics on the people who are visiting this blog have been pretty surprising. I can report that this blog has been viewed in 6 countries, 12 states, and 47 cities with a current total of 632 hits. What is even more surprising is that some of the places that are starting to gain numbers I have never been to, and in some cases, heard of. A few surprising places are Piscataway, NJ, Syracuse, NY, and Beaver Falls and Schwenksville, PA. All of you in those areas, keep it up, you're doing good work.

The one big disappointment so far has been the lack of written response in the bathroom stalls themselves. Most of the places I have posted in are still there in some capacity, though many have started showing signs of tearing. The ones that are completely intact rarely have anything written on them. I still get the impression that there are many people reading the Bill when they are in there though.

I have actually started to get more of a response at work. My camera and computer decided not to be friends today so all the pictures I have taken from today will appear on my photobucket page within the next few days. One response in the girls' stall now has a little rewrite in the second amendment. Now it says "the right of the people to keep and arm bears." To be honest, that sounds even scarier... or funnier depending on the picture in your head.

And then there was a dance student who saw it and gave me a written response. It reads: "When I saw the Bill of Rights on the wall of the bathroom, it was a shock in a reminding kind of way. Because we as citizens forget that those rights were made for us. And now in days government violates those rights all the time. It was a great reality check to know what I have rights to." His name is Alex E. Rodriguez and he's 17. Alex managed to hit my objective head on.

So what to do about all the silence? Well, I'll start by asking all you guys who have been following the blog and perhaps carrying it on in your town to send me some updates. If there has been no response in the stalls, you can write about that too. I want your thoughts on all of this. I'm hoping a press release might spark some more responses. In the mean time I am going to continue to think on this issue for a while to see what else I can come up with.

I also wanted to let you know I'm going to have to change my plans for my next push weekend that I was planning on doing next week. I will be doing a two day intensive acting workshop. It'll be a good boot camp for me and I am hoping to come out of it with some fresh perspectives. In any case, I'm going to have to reschedule that.

I can tell you on Sunday I will be attending the Dumbo Arts Center festival for some really cool interactive art. It is a festival that starts tomorrow and going through Sunday. This guy, John Bonafede, stopped to talk to me while I was in Union Square. He's doing this peice: "A pile of potatoes decend through a window later to be consumed and taken away in the bellies of the audience in a borderless installation and performace, Sustenance. Where: 45 Main St. Sidewalk. When: Sat&Sun 12-5."

I'll keep you posted about the next time I'm gonna try an organized thing. For now it's time to do some much needed unwinding.

Day 19 - Part II

2008-09-22T15:53:00.000-07:00

Today was another day in Union Square. It was very successful. Today my roommate Miranda decided to be awesome and sit with me the whole time. Three hours flew by so fast. 18 people took a total of 55 stickers.

Many people sat and chatted. One even went and tagged a few bathrooms and reported back. Because of the people I talked to over the past two days, I now have plans for the rest of my week. On Wednesday at 10:45am there is going to be a meeting on the steps of City Hall for people trying to get access to bicycles inside office buildings. I think that's a pretty important cause. As it stand most offices won't allow it, and with the price of gas and the desire to be green, we should be making it easier to use bikes, not harder. A big problem with bikes is that they are pretty easy to steal or damage when left outside. I should know, I've had two stolen since I moved here.

Wednesday at 7pm, the Tibetan Bridge Foundation is doing something about the History of Improvisation in American Art. This week is going to be about the 1950's. There is apparently some sort of physical improve at the beginning for everyone. If you are interested in checking it out the address is 325 West 37th Street, 10th Floor, NYC.

I'm beginning to pay more attention to the physical reactions people have to the project. My favorite, of course, is the happy surprised intrigued people. When I tell them the part about the bathroom stalls they can't help but smile and ask me why. Then there are others who have no real expression at all. So many people walked past, looking at my signs the whole time, but didn't stop. One guy read my signs, smiled at me and kept walking then turned back and asked what I was doing.

I have been surprised that the overwhelming majority of the people who stop are men. And while I'm sure that partly has to do with me being a cute girl, I still thought there would be more women interested in this project. I had a total of 3 women come and talk to me, compared to the 30 guys. The men were as varied as they come, but still, that's a pretty huge difference in gender.

I'm planning another event two weeks from now. Next time I'll make it a little later in the day and see if that changes things. If you are interested, mark your calenders for October 5th and 6th. I'll be out from 5 to 9. The place is yet to be determined. This is an experiment in planning.

The one thing that I've been thinking about today is all of the stuff I have collected from people over the past few weeks. I have often times done trades with people. I'll be interested to see how these objects accumulate.

Miranda said that as the day went on my face kept getting darker shades of happy. And it's true. This project has already been very successful for several reasons, but the one that is really sinking in tonight is the fact that this project makes me happy. Really happy. That is no small feat.

Tomorrow yoga and down time. I'll be back Wednesday.

18 - Day one at Union Square

2008-09-21T17:05:00.000-07:00

Today was a modest success. I had conversations with 15 people over the course of three hours. I unloaded 47 stickers. And I still have another day to go.

I met some really interesting people. A few sat and chatted for a bit, others just took a sticker and left. And tons of people walked passed, looked at my signs, smiled, and kept walking. The signs I had today said "think inside the box" and "ask me what I'm doing here." My thing was that I didn't want to be one of those annoying people who hound you down in the street. Tomorrow my signs will be different. I'm wondering if I'll get a different result.

The fact that some people sat and talked with me was the best part of the day. One that really resonated with me was a man I met right before I packed up for the day. He seemed about 35, pretty healthy, nice guy, but he was having a lot of trouble finding good work because of something he did when he was 13. He is currently homeless. I was listening to him talk about how he had resigned himself to the fact that he was going to be a worker until he died. He discussed how he knew he's never own anything or have a family. He was so matter of fact about it. He also talked about how he thought the only thing that would turn things around in this country was a revolution, but how he was against violence so he didn't want it.

Talking to strangers is a really good way to stay grounded. It reminds me why there is this constant struggle going on. It saddens me to know that there are people who have already given up on life. But sometimes, when you hear people's stories, you can hardly blame them.

As I was packing up and leaving, that same man called out to me. He told me it was a beautiful thing I was doing. That right there, that was one of those moments that completely validated this project for me all over again.

Day 17 - Come to Union Square tomorrow

2008-09-20T20:38:00.000-07:00

This is a really short one. I just want to remind everyone once more that I will be in Union Square (on the steps across the street from whole foods) tomorrow and Monday from 2-5. I'm going to rest up tonight, but hopefully there will be some interesting posts in the very near future.

Hope to see you there!

Day 15 - taking matters into my own hands

2008-09-18T19:48:00.000-07:00

On today's agenda was sending out an event invite to as many people as I could for this Sunday, the 21st. I'll be in Union Square starting at 2 pm. I'll have about 400 stickers to start. If you want to come it would be really great if you could print out your own before coming.

The other thing I did today was write a few tid-bits in the bathroom stalls of Abrons Arts Center. The one to your right says "#6 - I have the right to have my side of the story told." I did a couple more, you can check those out on photobucket. The idea was to start some conversations on these lonely white Bills. Because I work in a place that is often frequented by children I tried my best to translate some articles into language a kid could understand.

I am hoping that starting some conversations will make the chances of getting responses to go up. I figure it's no coincidence that the Sidewalk Cafe got so many responses. A big thing that is really sinking in to me is that the more energy I put in, the more response I get back. At some point I want to figure out how to put one of those "where I've been" maps either on here or my facebook. I'm two weeks in and I have already gotten about 400 hits to this blog, and the hits are coming from all over the country.

I think I am going to stop writing for now. It's nearing my bedtime. More tomorrow.

I look forward to seeing you on Sunday.

Day 14 - moving forward

2008-09-17T16:25:00.000-07:00

So we are at the end of our second week. Today I went back to check on some of my kids and was a bit disappointed at the results. Two more of my first round got taken down. Though what was left of one interested me. You can see what I mean if you go to either my facebook or photobucket.

What you are looking at on your right is what still survives of our Bill in Sidewalk Cafe's bathroom. You'll see that many more people responded. There were at least three more written responses, and who knows how many other people who tried to claw the sticker off. I really wish I could read what was there before people tore it, but the fact that it's still there, and with several responses is very encouraging indeed.

But the most common response to my project so far is silence. Which I suppose shouldn't surprise me, but it does anyway. I know there are people out there who have spent some time thinking about this. The question is how do I get you to speak up? I am realizing this idea still needs plenty of tweaking. I have far from exhausted my options. I think my next big move is to go out in force on Sunday. Anyone want to join me?

We still have two whole months before the day of the performance. Of course I wish this idea were more instantly successful, but I am not discouraged. The fact is that even in small numbers, people are responding. It's only a matter of time before some one says something interesting.

Day 9 - why I'm doing this

2008-09-12T18:48:00.000-07:00

So we are at day nine now. I'm realizing that this project is going to take endurance. I'm up for it. Now it's just a matter of getting you guys excited about it.

I guess I'm using tonight to talk a bit about why I'm doing this project.

This idea is something that has been brewing for quite some time. The seed was planted in college. I had a theater history teacher that really opened up my eyes about how life and art effect each other. She turned me on to a Brazilian revolutionary named Augusto Boal. His political views are bit too communist even for me, but his ideas are incredibly interesting. I don't want to bore you about him, but he was the one who really captured what I love about the theater.

It's that it's happening, right there in front of you. One thing I have always loved about the theater is that the audience and actor experience it together. And you can't help but be affected by each other. I like the idea of having a room full of people working through something together. The day of my performance I am going to want to hear from the people who cared enough to show up. And my hope is that we can get to the bottom of something. What happens between now and the performance is going to heavily determine how it goes.

I did this project because I know it is something I can do, I was fully capable of doing, and it might actually go somewhere if people take it seriously. One of my favorite shows of all time will always be The West Wing, and the one line that comes to me when I think of what I'm trying to do here is this "Never doubt that a small group of smart and dedicated people can change the world. Why? Because it's the only thing that ever has"

So why the bathroom stall? Because it's right there in front of you. You can say anything you want and someone else will read it. And it is accessible to everyone. I am interested in creating a physical reaction. I am doing everything I can do to reach you.

You are part of this play. Help determine what happens next.

Day 8 - trying new things

2008-09-11T17:11:00.000-07:00

The beginning of week two. I have to say, we had a better first week than I expected. A note to Philadelphia: whatever you are doing, keep doing it, it's working. The thing I am most amazed about at the moment is that of the 280ish hits I have gotten so far, 102 of them were from Philly. I want to hear from you guys.

I also wanted to let you know I've been working on my facebook today. For those of you who I just requested friendship from, poke around here, see if this is something you could get excited about. Find me on facebook by my e-mail address think.write.act@gmail.com. The great thing about facebook is that it'll make it easier for all of you to talk to eachother. It seems like you can post most anything these days.

I'm trying many things to insure that this idea catches on. One tactic I have started trying is trading my stickers for the stuff that other people pass out on the street. The other day I took two demo cds from some guys in time square. On Tuesday I traded two stickers to a guy who was trying to raise money for Obama.

I can feel this working, but it's not going to start getting really interesting until the people reading this get involved. Start talking. The big difference I have found between thinking about doing this project and actually doing this project is that now I look forward to coming home and working on it. Before I use to dread it. I procrastinated for a long time because I'm not very good with computers and because I wasn't quite sure how to approach this. Having a deadline helped a lot.

The hardest part is starting, after that we can all bounce of each other. I'll continue to be here anchoring this project, but you out there are the ones who are going to chart the course.

Pictures

2008-09-10T18:51:00.000-07:00

Okay, so I signed up for photobuck instead of Flickr... I'm not sure if that was a good idea. I can't seem to get the slide show going but here is the link for the album: Pictures
I also put the link in my Links of Interest section. This is the best I can do for now. My computer skills are pretty limited, but I'm a learn as you go kind of girl, so no worries, I'll figure out how to make it easier.

So here we are at the end of day 7 and I've got to admit, I'm beat. And proud. This was a really good week. This blog has been averaging 25 hits a day. I think that is a pretty darn good start. This past week I've worked harder than I have in quite some time, and I've got to say, I really enjoyed it. I've been putting about 3 to 4 hours into this project a day, and I love coming back to it every time.

It is very tiring work though, so I think I am going to reward myself with an early bedtime.

Day 6 - Thanks guys!

2008-09-09T16:45:00.001-07:00

So it looks like my project is making an impression on a few people. The picture to the left is from Sidewalk Cafe (Ave A and 6th). It's a great place. It looks like this is the work of two or three different people. In case you can't really see it, at the top it reads "Everyone should read this" and then going down the one side it says "14th Amendment- Equal rights for... and then a stick person." Underneath that it says "The foundation of humanity."

This was a very good find. Thanks to any of you who wrote this. One of the worries I have had going in to this was that I would get an overwhelmingly negative response if I got one. This picture proves there's hope. In case any of you are wondering what the 14th amendment actually says, here it is:
14th Amendment

So the next response is directed a bit more at me, but they were totally right. I realize I made one single typo in my first round of stickers. In the fourth amendment it should read 'probable cause' not 'probably cause'. Believe it or not I only found the typo two days ago. It is amazing how much you can read something and not even notice. I figure it can be a kinda cool this in a way. The only stickers that will have the typo are the first 250, so if people come across it, they'll know it was one of the first. I was going to put the picture of it right here but as it turns out I haven't figured out how to add more than one photo without out it looking stupid. No worries, I'll learn soon. I promise to make it my mission to figure it out how to do it by tomorrow.

There was one more response. The person underlined the "being necessary to the security" part of the second amendment and then wrote at the top of the page "There's NO way this is still necessary!!!" I have to say I agree. I do understand why it was so important at the time. Guns really were all they had to protect themselves. Personally, I think they should change it to "we have the right to protect ourselves." But I do suppose that lacks clarity.

So, three responses. Not too shabby. A few of the ones that were left standing the last time were gone, but there are still 5 out of the original 12.

The best part of the day was when Nuyorican Poets Cafe (E. 3rd St between C and B) agreed to let me post in all of their bathrooms. They led me to get the permission of Tribes (3rd st. between C and D) and Under St. Marks (St. Marks between A and 1st). To be honest, permission is the way I like best. Tomorrow I'm going to try out this "asking permission" thing some more. Wish me luck.

One of the things I'm loving about doing this project is getting to meet and talk to so many new people. Today I had no less than 5 conversations with people I just met as a result of this project.

It's six days into this experiment and things are already popping up.

Personally, I'm on the edge of my seat :).

Instructions on how to post

2008-09-08T11:44:00.000-07:00

I have been getting some questions on how one should go about making and posting the Bill of Rights. I figured I might as well let you know how I have been doing it.

So far I have ordered a total of 750 paper sized removable labels from the link below:
http://www.onlinelabels.com/Products/OL175cj.htm
You can also buy a package of 25 for $25.95 at Staples.

These labels are perfect because they are cheap to make and quick and easy to both post and remove. They are also nice because you can post them on any surface, and they are easy to write on. This will hopefully encourage people to at least try not to permanently damage the bathroom they post in.

I carry a back pack with me wherever I go anyway, so I have just started keeping a stack in my bag and any time I am in a bathroom stall I pull one out and post it in seconds. I like to post them where they will be easy to read while sitting on the toilet.

There are of course many other options on how to post, this is just the way I think is the best for everyone involved.

Happy sticking.

Questions

2008-09-07T10:18:00.000-07:00

A friend of mine was cool enough to send me some specific questions he had about this project. I thought they were so good I figured I'd make a post out of it.

1. When is the deadline?
It is true that I will be having a performance on November 16th. While I would like there to be a lot of activity in both bathrooms and the internet before then, it doesn't need to end there. If you have an idea for something that is more long term, go for it. I will continue to maintain the website for as long as there is still interest in it.

2. What do you mean we can change anything we want in the Bill of Rights?
I want you to read the Bill of Rights through and think long and hard about what you think they mean. Because the language of the bill is so antiquated, it would be great if people could come up with their own wording. Also, if you have an idea for what you think the Bill of Rights should be, even if it has no resemblance to the original, I'm interested in that too.

3. What are the photos meant to convey?
The obvious answer is that they should convey the responses generated by the posting. But really, it's up to you. The reason I have made the instructions for this project so vague is because I'm most interested in seeing what people turn it into. I am here to steer the project onward, but it is up to everyone to determine the content that gets generated.

4. The "write" part of thinkwriteact is unclear to me. Are you looking for people to write response-pieces about the bill and email them to you?
I would LOVE response pieces. I will post any that I get. And yes, e-mail is best. It will be the easiest way to keep track of everything. My roommate who has helped me out told me that when she was posting in bathrooms it physically turned her on. That's interesting to me. I don't want it to feel like homework or anything, but I would really love the hear people's thoughts.

5. I am having trouble finding your profile on facebook.
If you search for me by e-mail (think.write.act@gmail.com) it should be cake to find me.

I hope this answers your questions. If my responses have raised new questions for you I'm all ears. The one main thing to remember is that there aren't any concrete rules. If you have an idea that you think is good and that you would like to share, don't worry if it fits with what has already been generated. E-mail me about it. I guarantee it will interest me.

Day 3 - manpower needed

2008-09-06T21:22:00.000-07:00

So there it is! Our very first response. I suppose it was foolish of me to expect the first one to be a little more positive... though you have to admit, they have a point. This was taken at The Library on Avenue A and Houston. I put another one in there, I'm going to go check on it in a few days.

Yesterday I went and checked on all my babies and was very pleased to discover that 7/12 survived. That's not bad. I wasn't expecting more than two or three at most. And the fact that there was a response, even just the one, I think that is encouraging.

Tonight I endured the pouring rain to go to Time Square. My logic was that because it was a Saturday night and it was raining a lot, the restaurants and bars would be packed. Turns out, not so much. Everywhere I went was half empty, which is strange to me. I managed to post in 10 places.

I've been thinking about how this project will progress. One thing I think I will include is the cool bathroom graffiti I find while posting. I've also been thinking that for this to be really successful I need some of you boys to step up. I can really only post in Uni-Sex and girls bathrooms myself. Although I did accidentally post in the men's room at Virgin Records today. I also just need people in general. I'm really glad that there are quite a few of you who have expressed real interest. I just can't wait to hear from you!

So it's getting pretty late and I've been up for ages so I'm going to stop here. More tomorrow.

Day 1 - will it stick?

2008-09-03T19:25:00.000-07:00

So I have started seeding. I will go back tomorrow to see how they did. They are in the east village. I hope at least one makes it through the night.

Walking through the streets tonight, I felt accomplished. This project has been stirring in my head for a very long time. As cheesy as it sounds, it feels a bit like I've given birth tonight. It has left me spent and glowing. And much like having a child, now that it's separate from me I will never again have total control.

I've learned there's a lot to be said for little victories. Generally my goals for the day include trying to make a bare minimum of one person's day just a little better and attempting to do at least one productive thing a day... though some days one is all I can handle. Today my goal was to post the Bill of Rights in a minimum of 10 bathrooms. And guess what, I succeeded. Yay me!

Now let's see what tomorrow brings.

A Note to Naysayers and property owners

2008-09-03T19:03:00.000-07:00

The main objection with this project keeps stemming from its questionable legality. I say, this is the Bill of Rights we are talking about. I am interested in who comes down against it and who ends up being for it. I want to know people's reasons either way. One of my favorite things about this project is that everyone living in this country can have an opinion on it.

Think about what this project could mean. This is the time; people are listening. There are plenty of ways to participate in this project without actually leaving any lasting damage. Why not leave some post it notes in the stall for people? Make it your own.

I'm not trying to hurt anybody. I understand not everyone will want this in their bathroom, and I will do my best not to bother them. I'm more interested in the establishments who get that this could be a great idea. If your business really doesn't want the bill of rights in its bathroom, I promise to put you on a no hit list. Whether that would make you more or less likely to be targeted, I can't really say, but I promise not to encourage it. I want this to be hung where people want it. Who wants to work with me?

The reason why the bathroom stall is so important is that it gives us something tangible. It is a shared space we all have in common. It is a place where we all do some serious thinking from time to time. I'm not trying to overthrow the government here. I really like government, in fact, I'm quite a fan of ours. I just think that it needs some serious attention. There's a lot of interesting and intelligent people out there, isn't it worth hearing from them, even if we have no idea who they are?

I can't be sure what this project will accomplish until it gets a little deeper in, but I can promise to move forward with a positive, yet critical, spirit and an open heart.

The Bill of Rights

2008-08-19T12:28:00.000-07:00

The Bill of Rights
1. Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridge the freedom of speech, or of the press; or of the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances.

2. A well regulated militia, being necessary to the security of a free state, the right of the people to keep and bear arms, shall not be infringed.

3. No soldier shall, in time of peace be quartered in any house, without the consent of the owner, not in time of war, but in a manner to be prescribed by law.

4. The right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects, against unreasonable searches and seizures, shall not be violated, and no warrants shall issue, but upon probable cause, supported by oath or affirmation, and particularly describing the place to be searched, and the persons or things to be seized.

5. No person shall be held to answer for a capital, or otherwise infamous crime, unless on the presentment or indictment of a grand jury, except in cases arising in the land or naval forces, or in the militia, when in actual service in time of war or public danger; nor shall any person be subject for the same offense to be twice put in jeopardy of life or limb; nor shall be compelled in any criminal case to be a witness against himself, nor be deprived of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor shall private property be taken for public use, without just compensation.

6. In all criminal prosecutions, the accused shall enjoy the right to a speedy and public trial, by an impartial jury of the state district wherein the crime shall have been committed, which district shall have been previously ascertained by law, and to be informed of the nature and cause of the accusation; to be confronted with the witness against him; to have compulsory process for obtaining witnesses in his favor, and to have the assistance of counsel for his defense.

7. In suits at common law, where the value in controversy shall exceed twenty dollars, the right of trial by jury shall be preserved, and no fact tried by a jury, shall be otherwise re-examined in any court of the United States, than according to the rules of the common law.

8. Excessive bail shall not be required, nor excessive fines imposed, nor cruel and unusual punishments inflicted.

9. The enumeration in the Constitution, of certain rights, shall not be construed to deny or disparage others retained by the people.

10. The powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the states, are reserved to the states respectively, or to the people.

About ThinkWriteAct

2008-08-05T13:03:00.000-07:00

You're sitting in a bathroom stall, and there it is: The Bill of Rights. You're sitting there; it's taunting you. What with the current administration using it to wipe their butts, I thought you might want to see what the Bill of Rights looked like before it went in the toilet.

Here's a question, do you even get it? To tell you the truth, I've been staring at the damn thing for 8 months now and I barely understand it. What I do know is that this document is what America is supposed to stand for. These are what our forefathers decided are our most basic human rights. What do you think? Did they get it right?

In this facebook myspace blogger gawker tweeter flicker age, people are more attuned to how other people see the world than any other time in history. My thing is, maybe we should think about what kind of country we want. And what kind of country we've got. Take just a moment in this truly private place (maybe the only one left these days) and write something that matters to you. Write something you think will help us move forward. Write something you haven't told anybody. Write something.

All those somethings are going to be collected, read, and considered on this website and in bathroom stalls all over the country. On November 16th I will hold a performance/ town hall meeting based on the results of this project. I am interested in talking to people who believe in this country. I want to talk to the ones who know we aren't living in end times. But also know we have to DO something to make that true.

With the sheer number of ways to communicate these days, it's nice to have one that is deep rooted in reality. When you are in that bathroom stall that space is yours. For those brief moments you can do and say anything you want. Long after you disappear your thoughts will
stay.

I look forward to hearing from you

Who am I? And why should you care?

2008-08-03T14:30:00.000-07:00

So who am I? And why should you care?

I’m your quintessential idealist trying to do her part in making a contribution to the world. I’m one of those crazy hippies who really do believe we can make a difference. I am still trying to figure out how, and I am no where near having all the answers, but I’ve stumbled onto one basic fact and that is this: it all starts by trying.

A little background: I’m from Pennsylvania. I’m half Colombian, half American. I am 23 and have already attended 3 different universities; I’ve graduated from a total of none of them. I currently live in Brooklyn, NY. I grew up in the theater and went to school for acting. At Montclair (my most successful college venture) I developed a love for audience generated art, and have been working to create a project to explore this idea ever since.

So why is it you’re supposed to care again? I have learned that the best things in the world are born from people who decide to act as opposed to watch. The thing I’ve learned about myself is that one thing I do extremely well is listen. I have a genuine interest in seeing things from your point of view. And I have a genuine interest in learning from you. This project isn’t about me, it’s about you. There are a lot of good ideas out there with no place to call home. I say send them here and see what we can build with them.

Get Involved

2008-08-03T13:13:00.000-07:00

Think.
I want you to think about the Bill of Rights. Think about what they mean; think about what they get right and what they get wrong. Think about what you believe to be irrefutable rights. Does the constitution have you covered?

Write.
Write something. What I’m most interested in is your interpretation of our rights. But I’m also interested in ideas you have that you believe will make this country better. I am looking for creative and constructive criticisms that can help us as we move into the future.

Act.
Do something. Start by responding on this website, but don’t stop there. It doesn’t need to be big or world changing, just something positive, some small thing that adds quality to your and others lives. I challenge you to use our rights as a springboard for action. Other creative projects are an exciting option, but I am interested in anything your brain can dream up.

The directions are simple. The options are endless.

An easy and legal way to spread the Bill of Rights is to copy and paste the text from this site and print it out on plain computer paper. Tape it up in a bathroom of your choice and see what happens next. If you see the Bill of Rights in a bathroom stall and want to respond right there, I encourage you to write in the margins rather than on the stall itself.

To post on this site e-mail me. I will take care of it. I will only post your name if you want me to; otherwise your identity will be protected. Send me pictures of the bathroom stalls you have posted in, or ones you have found that you think are special. Make sure to include where the bathroom is. Tell me what your take on this project is. This project will only be successful with input from the public. Think of the things it could accomplish if people take it seriously. If I had my way, some of the real smarties out there will step up and use this website to take action and create new policy. Perhaps that’s a pipe dream, but I do think we could accomplish real change if we work at it.

The one thing I do ask is that you be respectful. I know one of the draws of anonymity is that you don’t need to take responsibility for your actions, but know that what you write will affect others. This project is not about vandalism, it is about using a common public space to connect and evolve. Avoid being destructive. Respect the space you are in. Understand this is a place that is solely yours when you are in it, but that it belongs just as much to everyone else.